Red Haired Girl
by Ex Oxide
Summary: A sidestory from the end of the Ocarina of Time saga. A lighthearted take on the characters is presented here. In the end after it's all said and done what does the hero do? Every one of his friends has an idea, Malon especially... giantess gts content
1. Visiting Old Acquaintances

Link awakens in his house in the Kokiri woods to the sound of children playing outside. He sits and looks out the window of his treetop home. Happy elf kids are playing tag. He sighs and sits up.

"What am I going to do today?" Link wonders aloud. "There isn't much for a hero to do now. Ever since I saved Hyrule and the whole time travel thing worked itself out I've been bored as all get out." He stands crouched down in the disproportionate home. "But I knew that. I wake up every day and say that. I almost wish I hadn't saved the kingdom so I'd have something to do…" He takes a swig of milk then refills the jar with the aid of his cow then exits sliding down the ladder.

"Should I visit Zelda today? I dunno, I mean whenever I stop by, formal dinner this, recite adventures that. It really gets old fast. She's so stuffy and uptight it's hard to relax around her anyway. Between that and Impa always around I just-"

"Hey Link." A familiar voice calls.

"Huh?" Link replies, train of thought lost looking around.

"Down here, funny man." An impatient Saria glares up at him.

"What? It isn't my fault you're so short!"

"Come on now! You know I won't get any taller, ever!"

"Sure whatever." Link chides. "What's up?"

"You want to go hang out in the forest? Play a game or two?" Saria asks. "We could do all sorts of things just like we used to…"

"Maybe later." The hero replies. "I have plans for today. I was going to visit Zelda."

"Oh…" Saria appears crestfallen.

"But we can definitely do it tomorrow!" He reassures her.

"Really?"

"As soon as I wake up." Link says smiling. "But I have to go now." He walks out of the forest.

X

In Hyrule Field Link walks toward the castle slowly. He can see the cloud kicked up by the amazing running guy and notes staying out of his way.

"I really don't feel very good about lying to Saria. But what choice did I have? I'm not a little kid anymore. I'm too old for those games. Hide and seek and playing with slingshots just isn't what I do anymore. Besides it's not like I'm really lying…I am going to visit Zelda. I just wasn't sure until just then."

Link walks some more. Now he can see the castle in the distance. "I hope she doesn't make a big deal of this. Last time I was here she declared a national holiday. That was the tiniest bit awkward. Ah, that won't happen. After all how could she know I was coming? I'm paranoid." Link walks over the drawbridge.

Link was wrong. The sight that he beheld was crazy but true. Zelda had done impossible things one after another. The whole scene couldn't possibly be. He was going to chalk it up to the princess's sage powers this time around.

"Greetings, Hero of Time!" Zelda yells over a bullhorn.

"I, uh, hi." Link says shakily to everyone.

Zelda had known he was coming. So she did the only thing she thought was fit. She arranged a parade and festival. All at ten in the morning no less and with an amazing turn out to boot.

"We are very grateful for what you have done for us all!" Zelda calls from the top of a float.

Link says nothing. His mouth is still agape at the spectacle before him. A gala had unfolded in his honor very early in the morning. "I wonder what would've happened if I slept in?" He ponders. "Really, I mean how about me being tardy to my own celebration?" It's a point he has a chuckle at to himself.

"Three cheers for Link!" Zelda yells gesturing to Link.

Link boards the float (shaped like his head) amid the cheering and screaming next to Zelda with the same expression. He shakes his head disbelievingly. "Ay yi yi…" He thinks to himself.

"What's wrong, Link?" Zelda asks without the bullhorn. "Smile!" The float begins to move.

The Kokiri raised Hylian looks around at all the people. He spots Impa in the crowd. "Not a bad disguise." He thinks to himself. "She could-" He feels an elbow in the side. He smiles forcefully. The exhibition is making him light-headed though. The cheering, confetti and pyrotechnics (she had managed to get some Gorons to handle that) were giving him a headache.

"I can't believe this. I'm coasting through Hyrule Market on a float shaped like my head with fireworks going off at 10:30 in the morning!" Link thinks incredulously. "This is insane." The float goes into the castle and with one last blast of sound the crowd quiets down.

"So, Zelda how are you?" Link asks relieved to be away from the festival.

"Now, now, Link wait." Zelda replies, climbing down. "There will be time for talk inside."

"Please don't be a formal dinner, please." Link is praying as he hops off the float. They walk into the castle.

"May I take your things?" Asks the doorman.

"What, my gear?" Link says dubiously. "I don't think so."

"Come now, Link. Do you think that is proper attire for dinner?" Zelda asks.

"The lady is quite right. Weapons have no place at a formal dining engagement. It is a pity you do not have any formal wear." The doorman agrees.

"I would really rather not."

"Are you certain? Such a burden cannot be very comfortable."

"I'll manage." Link gives him a hard look. Zelda nods at the doorman and he lets Link pass.

They walk into the dining hall and it is decked out as though he has just saved Hyrule a second time. Golden candelabra and goblets along with freshly polished silverware. The plates and napkins tied and arranged in ways that Link cannot fathom. What has to be a dozen covered dishes weigh the great table down.

"Am I the only one who realizes it's not even noon?" Link wonders looking at the way the table it set. "Pretty fancy way to tie a napkin for breakfast. I can't believe she broke out the good silver for what had better be pancakes. I can't understand what the big deal-"

"Link." Says a voice from behind him. "It is good to see you."

"Hello Impa." Link replies without turning around. "I saw you in the crowd. Nice disguise."

"Hmm, I do not make a convincing old lady?"

"Needs work." Link affirms. "What is all this for? I don't see anyone else."

"It's for you." Zelda says. "It's the least I could do."

"Me? All of this? Are you serious?"

Zelda nods. "Since I didn't know what you felt like eating we've got breakfast, lunch, and dinner of all kinds fresh prepared."

"For me?" Link says still stuck on the volume of food on the table.

"Yes."

"There's got to be some mistake. The townspeople must have my plate because all of theirs are still here."

"There is no mistake." Impa says. "This is for you." She and Zelda look at Link expectantly.

"But I'm not even hungry! I just woke up an hour ago! Why did you throw me a parade?"

"You deserve it. You saved everyone." Zelda replies. "You saved me. I'll never forget that."

Link mulls over that a moment. "So now I can be the cause of the next famine? Lord Jabu-Jabu only asked for a single fish for tribute. This is enough to feed him one good meal!" He turns to his royal hostess. "Isn't this the slightest bit ridiculous? I mean I come by to talk and you throw parades and festivities-"

"Don't you like it?" Zelda asks.

"Not really. I just want to-hey don't cry!"

Princess Zelda has started crying. "All I want to do is show my appreciation and-" She runs from the room. Link moves to pursue her but Impa blocks his way.

"You have upset the princess."

"I know. I'm trying to apologize. I have to explain." Link tries to squeeze past. Impa does not allow it. "Impa!"

"You have done enough. Please leave."

"But-"

"Go."

Link leaves the castle. Though the celebration is still going on no one bothers him as he walks out.

X

In Hyrule Field Link is walking. It's not even midday yet and he hasn't found anything to do.

"That went bad." Link says aloud. "Very bad. I didn't mean to upset her. I was only trying to say that I don't need a hero's welcome. The first time we met I snuck into the castle like a bandit. Not that I wish it were that way again it's just that I'm a Hylian like any other. I'm not that special." He thinks back.

"Nabooru treated me like a no-name kid. She condescended in all kinds of ways to me. She didn't act like I was special. Maybe I should visit her and see how she is doing." He walks over to Gerudo Valley to pay her a visit. It just so happens she's standing around at the brigde to the entrance of the territory and sees him coming.

"Well if it isn't my favorite male Gerudo!"

"Between me and the King of Evil…" Link thinks to himself sarcastically. "Hi Nabooru! What's up? How have things been?"

"I've been hoping to see you." Nabooru says indicating he follow her. "I've been hard at work trying to break your record. You are a great archer but I got a perfect score! Can you match it?"

"Sure! I'm the best!" Link replies, playing Epona's song. Epona gallops up to him and they begin the trial of horseback archery, marksmanship on the move.

Two hours later finds both Link and Epona pooped. His hands are cramped, fingers sore, and his behind hurts something awful. Epona isn't any better. The filly is covered in sweat and winded sides heaving. Neither of them appears as though they plan on continuing.

"I can't go on." Link says falling the seven feet out of the saddle. "Neither can Epona."

"Giving up already?" Nabooru asks teasingly. "Tired from a little riding?"

"My hands hurt, my arms hurt, my back hurts, my legs hurt, and my butt hurts. I don't think she wants to keep going either." Link gets up and gives Epona a couple carrots. "You did great; now go on home before she makes us ride again." He gives her a reassuring pat. She walks off.

"I heard that!" Nabooru says from behind him.

"Good. Can't mistreat my horse. You need to know. You can put me through the ringer but Epona doesn't need that kind of treatment." Link takes a draught of his milk. "That hits the spot!"

"Ready for your next exercise?"

"What? I already got the Ice Arrow?"

"I wasn't talking about that." Nabooru smiles. "But now that you mention it I did redesign the trial. Want to give it a try for old time's sake? You had the best record there too."

"I'm wiped out. There is no way I can-"

"Scared? I would be too. Even though the first time you breezed right through it. Things have changed."

"I'm not afraid! I'm beat! Can't you see? I can barely stand up!"

"Almost every other Gerudo has been through there since then. Don't you want to set the standard?"

"Can't we just talk a while? That archery has me whipped."

"That's no way for the finest male bandit in the world to act! I'll even waive the entry fee, come on."

"All right." Link says grudgingly. "Since you won't take no for an answer."

X

At Lon Lon Ranch Malon is just getting back from the market. After making a couple of milk sales and running her errands she's about ready to take a break.

"Malon, you take alla that food up to the castle?" Talon asks when she walks in.

"Yeah, pa I did." Malon replies. "Took a long while, what was it all for?"

"Some kind of celebration I reckon."

"I know that! What celebration?"

"Something about that feller who went an fixed everything. Can't rightly remember his name…"

"Link, that's what it was."

"That's it! Ain't seen him round here in a good while though."

"Nope. Wonder what he's been up to?"

"I dunno. Now that you're back I'm takin me a nap, I know that much."

"All righ'. One question though pa. Where's Epona?"

"She ran off and jumped the gate again. Does that an awful lot, wonder where she goes?"

"I know where. He had better not be mistreatin' her."

"Say what, pumpkin?"

"Never you mind. Go on to bed." Malon walks out into the yard. "The least he could do is visit if he's gonna borrow my horse all the time." She thinks counting horses in the pasture.

At this time Epona walks into the ranch. The steed is taking her sweet time and whinnies to get some attention. It's not too long before she's obliged and her caretaker is all over her.

"Well you're back. Where have you been?" She gives her mount the once over. "Link been runnin' you ragged again?" She grabs the horse's bridle. "What you need is a rubdown an some cool off time" She takes the saddle off and tethers Epona. "I'm gonna tend to you in a minute. If Link needs to go somewhere right now he's gonna have to walk! I hate to tie you up but I can't have you runnin' off an wearin' yourself out for his sake."

X

In the Gerudo training grounds Link is having a hard time. Having done it before isn't offering him the advantage that he thought it would and that may be due to his forgetting some of the puzzles but it has been a while.

"How did she get more lava in here?" Link thinks rubbing his brow. "Even with my Goron tunic it's way too hot in here."

Link manages to solve the puzzle and a key appears. It is high up and he ponders how to reach it.

"One more and I complete the trial." Link readies the hookshot. "Now which outcropping do I use to latch the hook to?" Judging from his angle and distance he decides the left one and fires the grappling mechanism. "Then I'll have completed this again and I can take a breather." He thinks as he flies toward the silver goal.

At the length of the hookshot in mid travel Link can see that he has made an error. He will not be landing on the platform with the key on it. It's not something he's proud of, especially since he should've know what to do since he's been through it once before. Something he'll be thinking of as he deals with the consequences of his current decision.

"Damn, the edges of the platform are too smooth. I can't grip onto them. I wish I had chosen the other ledge." As the hookshot lets go he uses his left hand to snag the key and pocket it. "This is going to hurt." Link thinks as gravity activates on him.

Twenty minutes later Link staggers out of the training grounds. He is a mess. Holes are everywhere in his tunic, boots almost gone and covered in soot from head to foot.

"Time!" Nabooru yells as Link emerges. "This is the worst I've ever seen!"

"I got the 'Ice Arrow' aren't you satisfied?" Link holds up an arrow with a blue feather in it.

"I guess." Nabooru says disappointed. "I expected better though…"

"I'm sorry, I couldn't do any better." Link replies changing to his Hover Boots.

"I blazed through it." Nabooru says as an afterthought.

"You designed it!" Link thinks angrily but he holds his tongue.

"Looks like you blazed period." She laughs at Link who puts on his Kokiri tunic.

"Well, I'm done."

"That's all that matters. Now to the final trial…"

"Final trial?"

"The Spirit Temple. I made a pact with the spirits. Nobody can solve the puzzles and get to the end the way I have it rigged up!" She says enthusiastically. "Want to give it a try?"

"I'm tired, sore and now burnt!"

"Don't you want to be the first to accomplish it? Nobody else has even come close!"

"No, I'm leaving!" With that Link begins to run as fast as he can with boots that have no traction will allow.

"Come on, don't be a spoiled sport!" Nabooru says pursuing him.

By this time Link has built up some speed and is heading for the bridge. He stops right before the wooden suspension and looks ready to collapse. He's had enough. It's the end of the line and he turns around to face his stalker, on the verge of falling out.

"Sure are running fast to be so fatigued." Nabooru says.

Link turns around. "I can't go any further. This is it. I've reached my limits. I can't take another step."

"Well you should."

"Why?"

"Because you're standing on air."

Link looks down. His no-friction footwear has allowed him to slide beside the bridge and float next to it. Looking down he can see the river below him. Not a comforting sight at all.

"How long does the floating-?" Nabooru begins. But Link's trademark scream cuts her short and answers her unfinished question as he disappears into the canyon.

X

Link wakes up to Princess Ruto staring him in the face. At this unexpected sight he draws back and coughs up water. He shakes his head and looks around, still disoriented.

"Link are you all right?" Ruto asks, concerned.

"Yeah, sure." He recognizes the area around him. "How did I get here?"

"My guess is you came down the river. I found you floating face down in the lake so I dragged you to the island and resuscitated you."

"Resuscitated?" Link says uncertainly.

"Yes. Mouth to mouth as you humans prefer to do it." Ruto blushes slightly. "It's the least I can do for my fiancé. I rather enjoyed it."

Link turns more than a little green at that remark and more water comes up. Ruto laughs. "How long have I been out?" He asks noting the sun's position.

"I don't know. How long can humans last without air? An hour?" Ruto shrugs.

"I guess it depends on how long I was face down. No telling when I turned over, I suppose."

"No matter. I'm glad you visited. Come with me." Ruto dives into the water.

"You just had to 'resuscitate' me! I almost died!"

"You have a point." Ruto replies bobbing back to the surface. "Make sure to wear my keepsake. Wouldn't want you 'dying' on me again." She smiles and disappears back into the lake.

"Cant get no rest." Link grumbles, pulling on the Zora tunic. "Nobody's listening." He laces up the Iron Boots. "I don't even like the water!" He plods into the lake. He sinks quickly. Ruto is waiting for him at the bottom. She swims to the temple entrance. Link follows with a shrug and they enter the temple.

"Here we are!" Ruto says happily.

"The Water Temple." Link says looking around. "What's the big deal?"

"Can't you see?"

"It's your temple. You are its sage. You keep it in working order. I think I covered everything."

"It's **our** temple fiancé! And when we get married you will help me take care of it!"

"Not this…again with the marriage…" Link thinks tuning her out. "This'll be a while."

Link was right. Ruto took him on a tour of the temple and pointed out everything that needed maintenance and how to do it. The water level rose and fell but it didn't matter. He could still hear her go on and on. It didn't help that she was invading his personal space the whole time. It just served to remind him how annoying Ruto could be. One reason he hadn't planned on visiting her today among many.

"I think that's everything." Princess Ruto says after a while. "You may go."

"It's kind of late I should be- really?" Link says astounded.

"Yes. You look tired." Link moves to go. "Don't forget we're still getting married!"

X

At Lon Lon Ranch Malon is making sure the farm is locked up tight for the night. After doing the evening chores she's all but ready for bed herself.

"Cows locked up." Malon thinks. "Pasture closed up. Fed all the animals. Put Talon to bed." A noise gets her attention. "Epona! I left you all tied up, I'm sorry!" She apologizes. "Wait a second; he's callin' you again isn't he? Hold on an let me put your saddle back on."

X

On the shore of Lake Hylia Link lies on his back. Too exhausted to move he just waits patiently staring up at the sky for his ride.

"I'm completely enervated." Link says up to the stars. "I've been through a parade, torturous training, the entirety of the river and Ruto all in the same day! I don't know how much more I can stand. Heck I can't even do that. I only want to go home. Where's Epona? I played the song a while ago, how can a horse be late?" As if on cue hears the sound of hooves. "Ah." He sits up. "About time!" He turns to Epona.

Malon is sitting astride her. She doesn't look too happy. Link looks immediately contrite but that doesn't wipe the frown off the farm girl's face.

"I'm sorry about earlier! I didn't mean to-"

"What run my best friend half into the ground?" Malon says accusingly, dismounting. "When she got back she was quakin' an shakin' fit to fall!"

"I know!" Link admits. "I didn't want that to happen!"

"I had to tie her up just so she could rest! Cause if you'd a called her again she'd have worn herself out!"

"I wouldn't do that! I know she was tired! Nabooru started it!"

"Huh?" Malon sits across from Link. "Tell me what happened." Link relates what happened in Gerudo Valley earlier. "You fell out of the saddle?"

"Yeah, she kept egging me on and taunting me and I couldn't do any more then bam! I hit the ground."

"Sounds like you had a bad day."

"I go visit people and they keep taking it the wrong way. I merely want to talk but they don't want to hear it!"

"Well, you can talk to me, fairy boy." Malon says shyly. "I'll listen."

"Really?" Link says hopefully.

Malon nods. "Talkin' goes two ways. I done gave you a piece of my mind, now it's your turn."

Link wastes no time in telling Malon about the rest of his day. About how Saria wants him to play childish games and Zelda keeps throwing parties in his honor. He elaborates on how grueling the training was and irritating to be shanghaied into an engagement with someone you don't know well.

"You are kinda big for a game of tag." Malon concurs. "It's pretty obvious to me."

"That's what I'm saying!"

"I remember when we first met an I taught you Epona's song. It was a while ago."

"Yeah, it's been seven years."

"You were such a weird boy. You were carryin' round so much stuff. You would come by and show me it. All the crazy things you kept in jars an all sorts of other stuff."

"Remember the Magic Beans?"

Malon laughs. "How could I forget? You brought a bunch by an dared me to eat them with you. To see who could eat the most." She laughs again.

Link laughs shakily. "You don't remember how it went do you?"

"Of course! You put one in your mouth an spit it out like it was on fire! You made the funniest face an changed all kinds of colors. You were so funny. You drank a whole bottle of milk to get the taste out of your mouth."

"That tasted terrible!"

"I swallowed all the rest of them. Some dare that was."

"How could you eat those things? They were horrible!"

"They were vegetables, ever heard of those?"

Link makes a blank face. "Vega-whats?"

"What would a backwoods fairy boy know about vegetables?" Malon asks herself. "Probably ate nothing but nuts an berries all day. Well I like vegetables, they taste good so there!" She says decidedly.

"If by vegetable you mean magical plant seed that grows super fast and to be pretty big I suppose you have that right. The guy who sold them to me was chomping them up, wouldn't stop crunching on them."

"Magical plant seed?"

"Yeah, they grow into giant lily pads that fly by night."

"You're pullin' my leg!"

"You're right. Must be the exhaustion talking." Link says not feeling like explaining.

"You know what I heard?"

"What's that?"

"That you're a master musician."

"I'm pretty good."

Malon giggles. "I find that hard to believe."

"Why?" Link asks defensively.

"Because when we first me you couldn't play the ocarina at all! I taught you your first song if you remember."

"That may be true but I'm good now!"

"Show me. Play Epona's song for me."

"That song I know best." Link says grinning, ocarina in hand.

"Is that the same ocarina?"

"Yep." Link had returned the ocarina of time to Zelda and had only the simple Deku wood instrument given to him by Saria. "You ready?"

Malon and Link begin to play. She sings along and harmony forms immediately. They make music under the stars awhile, Epona close by. Lake Hylia echoes with the melody until they stop.

"You've gotten a lot better there, fairy boy. You could barely get through the song before. Fairy boy?" Malon looks at Link.

The bard of the hour's chin rests on his chest, instrument still hanging from his mouth. It is apparent that he is finished. His breathing goes in and out of the woodwind item causing a slight whistling noise.

"Plumb tuckered out. I would be too." Malon says sympathetically. "He should get on home. Be a shame to wake him though." She walks over to Link. "Shouldn't be too heavy." She lifts him and puts him across the front of the saddle. "Good thing I ate my vegetables." She mounts behind him and rides off.

X

At the ranch, Malon has just put Link to bed. After tucking him in the bed within the guest house she's ready to do the same.

"Sleep tight." Malon says leaving the room. "It's late; I may need some shut eye myself." She goes to bed.

Malon begins to dream. She is out singing in the moonlight in the middle of the horse enclosure like usual. But then there is something wrong. She begins to grow.

"What is all this?" Malon wonders from her new vantage point. "I don't understand."

She can see Link nearby sitting on the ground. He is staring at the moon and hasn't noticed her transformation. Then he looks up at her. He stands and backs away, eyes big enough to see from where she is.

"Don't be afraid." Malon says moving in his direction. "I won't hurt you." She takes a step. The horses become skittish. "Just wait, please."

It seems that her words reach Link. He stops at the gate and he turns to look at her.

"Thank you." Malon walks over to Link and sits down next to him.

Then the dream ends. Malon wakes up as the rooster crows.

"Odd dream to be havin'." She remarks to no one. "I wonder which one is it." She thinks back. "Ma always said dreams were things you want to happen, things you don't want to happen, or the way things were gonna to happen. I can't be sure which one it is though. But I can't wonder about that all day. Got to get started.

Malon gets up and starts breakfast.


	2. Battered and Lacerated

Link wakes up to the sun in his eyes. He sits up. Finding that his feet and arms are not hanging off the bed he is surprised.

"You'd make a terrible farm hand." Comes from the doorway. Malon walks in. "Cause you'd be late every day."

"How did I get here?" Link asks looking around. "Last I remember I was at the lake playing my ocarina…"

"I'll bet!" Malon smiles. "You dozed off with it in your mouth! Wasn't nothing I could do to wake you either. Eyes didn't open a bit when I carried you in here."

"Carried?" Link blushes a bit.

"Yep. You don't weigh much. Dropped you in bed an tucked you right in."

"Tucked me in?" Link asks nervously reddening some more.

"Mm hm. An you slept like a baby." Malon giggles. "Do all you elves sleep late?"

"Of course!" Link replies, hopping out of bed. "We sleep late and play all day. That's all we ever- Saria!" He says remembering his promise. "I have to go." He grabs his ocarina from the nightstand and begins to play the Minuet of the Forest.

"Well, you come back soon, okay?" Malon steps aside. Link nods and disappears in a green flash. "Why does he need a horse if he can do that?" She wonders in the wake of his sudden exit.

X

In the Sacred Forest Meadow all the Kokiri are gathered. It's a major event today and as always there is a big turnout for the slingshot competition.

"All right is everybody here?" Saria asks.

"All accounted for." Mido replies doing a head count. "Except-"

"Deku babas taken care of? Teams formed?"

"Done and done."

"All that's left is Link, where is he?" Saria wonders. "He wasn't at home. But he promised…"

"Going to start without me?" Link asks from the exit of the maze.

"Link!" Saria says happily. "You came!"

"Is that really such a surprise?" Link draws his slingshot. "What are the rules?"

"You and Saria are the best shots around so we get handicaps because you're on the same team." Mido says sulking. "We get to use Deku Nuts and shields too."

"Don't we get a handicap?" Link asks putting his shield away. "I've played this game before, flashbombs and shields aren't fair."

"Your team each member gets five hits out. We get only three. No doubles anybody."

"Our team is all girls." Saria says. "Mido's is boys." Link nods. "Are we ready? Scatter!" Everyone dives into the bushes and leaps away leaving Link standing alone.

"Five on five and I can't fit in all these tight spaces. No shield and flashbombs bad combination." Link thinks stalking stealthily. "Five hits out, like that evens things up. He hears movement in the bushes; he crouches down sling at the ready. Then he hears a girl scream from behind him. "That's one." He thinks glancing back.

That cost him as the deku boy in the bushes popped out and fired on him. Link counters quickly firing twice. First he hits a Deku Shield then he scores. His target flees back into the bushes, stung by a Deku Seed.

"Doubles!" Calls the boy diving back into cover.

"It isn't doubles unless the first shot hit!" Link yells.

"Link's right!" Affirms a deku girl. "Ow!"

Link slinks further. He reaches a clearing. Suddenly he's surrounded. He fast draws and fires on the first person he sees. He narrowly misses. The other two targets fire on him and vanish.

"Hey, friendly!" The girl admonishes hitting an escaping boy. "You nearly hit me!"

"Sorry." Link says to the girl. "Doubles!" He yells out to whoever is moderating the combat.

"It isn't doubles unless it's the same person!" Mido protests.

"Mido is right." Saria agrees grudgingly.

Down a narrow corridor a deku boy confronts Link. He doesn't see a sling but a deku nut. Sure enough movement behind him and he is cornered. Instead of drawing he hits dirt eyes shut. The flash goes off and he hears ow from in front of him.

"Sorry! I was aiming for Link!" He fires on Link and would've escaped but Saria blocks his path and shoots. They hit each other. "I'm out!" He says.

Not to be stopped the Forest Sage fires on the flashbomber as well. "I'm out too!"

"Link are you okay?" Saria asks helping him up. "How many points?"

"Four." Link whispers. "You?"

"Two."

"Let's stick together." They creep off as a pair intending to cover one another.

They come to the entrance. It's eerie, looking around they can't see anyone. It's strange because the maze should be alive with movements of young children. It is very suspicious. Upon closer inspection the only scenery is bushes, leaves and one kokiri hat.

"Ambush!" Link yells. "Cover your eyes!"

The remaining deku boys emerge flinging Deku Nuts. The surroundings disappear in a flash of white light. "Now!" Mido commands. "While they can't see!"

Link opens his eyes to two boy perched on a wall slings cocked at him. He fires but wood stops him. They counter and the Hero of Time would've been taken out of the game but Saria jumps in and takes the hits for him. Then they fire in conjunction this time hitting both with Deku Seeds.

"Darn!" Squeals one.

"Crud!" Yelps the other.

"Thanks." Link says to Saria.

"Look out!" Saria screams looking past him.

Link turns around and Mido fires. He catches a Deku Nut between the eyes and his head snaps back with the impact of the projectile. It bursts on contact and the accompanying point blank flash coupled with the head trauma persuades him to fall unconscious.

X

When he wakes up he can hear Saria and Mido arguing. It's a heated conflict and it sounds like the boss of the Kokiri is taking it from the sage of the forest.

"It was a mistake!" Mido yells. "You've got to understand!"

"That was low, Mido. I didn't think you would do that." Saria sounds disappointed.

"I grabbed a Deku Nut by mistake! I meant to hit him with a Deku Seed!"

"All the advantages you had and you still cheated." The sage closes her eyes and shakes her head "The boys are good shots and fast. You had both shields and flashbombs. Not to mention Link can barely use a sling anymore no matter how good a shot he is and is easy to hit on top of that."

"Saria, did we win?" Link asks.

"No. Mido ambushed our backup before we got there." Saria says. "When you took the Deku Nut in the head I couldn't see so I got hit right after you."

"I can't see could you help me up?"

"Now Link is blind, are you happy?" Saria snaps at the boss of the Kokiri.

"I'll be fine. Just help me up."

"Are you sure you'll be alright?" The Kokiri girl asks worriedly. "Your eyes are wide open."

"Yeah, just take me to Goron City through the Lost Woods. I got to get out of the sun."

"Okay." Saria leads him to the stone doorway. "Straight ahead. Sorry."

"It's nothing. See you later, I hope." Link hobbles off.

X

After staggering around a few minutes in Goron City a helpful resident takes him to Darunia.

"Well if it isn't my sworn brother!" Darunia says loudly. "How are you?"

"Blind for right now." Link replies. "Had to get out of the sun."

"How did that happen?"

"Took a Deku Nut between the eyes from a sling."

"I see the mark." The Goron leader grimaces. "Why did that happen?"

"I was playing a game with the Kokiri."

"Aren't you too big for that, brother?"

"Yeah, hey can we sit down? Do you have any time to spare?"

"Sure." Darunia leads Link to his chamber.

Upon arrival in the chamber of the Fire Sage he is shown a chair and takes a seat, plopping down on the cushion wearily. Link launches right into the events of yesterday and today. Darunia listens nodding. After a time he stops.

"Nobody wants to listen. I only want to talk. What should I do?" Link asks the mountain resident. "If I don't come by and visit they'll think I'm stuck up and don't like them but if I do I could end up with a monument, a bride, and a funeral!"

"Tough choice. What's wrong with that last girl you mentioned, the redhead? You didn't say."

"I didn't? That's because there isn't anything!" Link exclaims. "That's the problem! If I hang out with her the others will think I'm avoiding them."

"They say 'hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.' You may want to take care."

"That's the kicker! What do I do?"

Darunia thinks a minute. He isn't certain what to say. The sages are his friends but Link is his brother so he is in a dilemma. "Give them another chance." He says at length. "I don't know what else to say. It'll put off making the decision a bit longer."

"But I can't take much more!" Link cries. "I can't be a playmate/hero/legendary bandit/fiancé much longer. Something's going to give and I'm afraid it's going to be me! Then I'll be down in Kakariko with Dampe the gravekeeper watching over me. That would be even worse. Slightly but worse."

Darunia chuckles. "You'll pull through. You'll figure something out. After all you aren't the Hero of Time just because of your fighting skills. There was more to it than monsters to defeat. There were puzzles and this one is a mind boggler."

"You don't realize what I'm going through." Link says rubbing his eyes. He starts blinking. Fuzzy mist starts to clear.

"You're right. Wouldn't trade places with you for all the rocks in the world right now. I really don't need that good a grasp on it anyway. I know you will think of something."

Link stands. "Thanks, I guess." He rubs his eyes again. A semblance of vision has returned. "I'll see you later." He turns to leave.

"Come back and tell me how it goes!" Darunia says laughing heartily.

X

In the Temple of Time Link suddenly appears in a yellow crackle of energy. He's on a mission and nothing is going to stand in his way. Except maybe common sense.

"Give them another chance, what is he crazy?" Link wonders walking out. "That has to be the stupidest idea I've ever heard! Which explains why I'm doing it."

Link walks into the market place. All the usual hustle and bustle and customary shoving but no festivities. "At least there is no parade…" He walks up to the castle.

"Good afternoon." The doorman greets Link. "The princess has been expecting you."

"Has she now?" Link says absently.

"May I?" The doorman reaches for the champion's equipment.

"No." Link walks into the great room. "No parade, trumpets, banquet…what is she up to?"

"Link! What a wonderful surprise!" Princess Zelda rises to greet him. "Meet Calle." She gestures behind her. A young Gerudo lady waves at him.

"Hello…" Link says uncertainly looking at Zelda for an explanation.

"She's a biographer. She would like to immortalize your story in a book."

"What?"

"She wants to tell your story for ages to come. Could you start from the beginning?" Everyone looks at him expectantly.

"Why don't you tell her?" Link thinks annoyed. "I've told you enough times."

"I'm ready anytime, sir." Calle says pen at the ready.

"Okay…" Link clears his throat. "It all began…" Then he tells the story of how he saved the kingdom. It is a long tale and to add insult to injury he has to repeat some parts to clarify things and some of the journey that he would rather not remember.

"…And that's how it happened." Link concludes three and a half hours later.

"Thank you very much Link sir!" Calle gushes. "It was an honor to interview the male bandit!"

"That was interesting." Zelda says.

"Wasn't it?" Link replies. "Think I fell asleep a few times." He remarks to himself. "May I be excused?"

"Most certainly. Thank you again."

X

Sliding through Hyrule Field on Hover Boots Link walks toward Gerudo Valley. The sun is almost down. Though it signifies that the day is ending the Hylian doesn't feel like things are getting any better. He's got a terrible feeling of trepidation and it's almost killing him.

"Still don't get why I'm doing this." Link says to nobody. "I've got to be an idiot. She's probably going to put me in the Sprit Temple where I'll be certain to get companions to today's concussion from pots and floor tiles heading my way. Eerie place the Spirit Temple." Link arrives at the bridge to Gerudo Valley. "I know I've got something better to do…"

The guard isn't there. Link can't see anyone. "Not a good sign, I should go home but…" He draws his sword and moves in warily. He sneaks in silently as the boots don't touch ground and notes a crowd. Suddenly they all turn and look his way. He puts up his shield ready for anything.

"There he is! The male bandit, the best swordsman of all Gerudo!" Nabooru yells. "Even now he's ready for battle!" The Gerudo cheer. "Do you think he's ready for me?"

"Nabooru, what's the big idea?" Link asks sheathing his sword, Biggoron's Nail (Master Sword for all intents and purposes)

"Just in time Link! Our tournament is about to start!" Nabooru replies. "It would be perfect if we could kick it off with an exhibition match between us. What do you say?"

"Not really. Can't do much fighting against someone like you in these boots." Link replies easily. "No traction."

"I took care of that. Got your old ones fixed. You left them yesterday." Link's Kokiri boots, freshly patched with Gerudo leather, are presented to him. "Shall we go?"

"What else can I say?" Link wonders, slipping on his old footwear. "Excuse is no good." He draws Biggoron's Nail.

"I've been looking forward to this." Nabooru draws her twin scimitars. "We haven't crossed swords before."

"In the Spirit Temple we did." The hero of Time reminds her. "You may have been preoccupied with something else at the time, being an Iron Knuckle and all…"

"That doesn't count. Make this good." Nabooru advances. Everyone else fans out, making a ring.

"Rules?" Link asks not taking his eyes of the leader of the Gerudo.

"First to three points wins." Nabooru replies. "Or first to fall." She slashes forward. "Don't be shy."

"I won't." Link says deflecting then thrusting. He grazes his opponent.

"One point, Link!" The judge says. The crowd watches silent.

"You're good." Nabooru slashes quickly in succession. All blocked by the Mirror shield. "But I'm better." She goes for a leg sweep. Link jumps aside but a follow up slash catches him in the arm. An odd shade of purple forms on his Zora tunic.

"One point Nabooru!" The crowd cheers.

"Messy technique." Nabooru says. "You can do better." She dances forward spinning gracefully.

"You should talk." Link says thrusting forward again.

"Not quite." He narrowly misses her back.

"Really?" Link finishes by bringing the sword up and catching a shoulder with the tip of the blade. She counters with a backspin that leaves a mark in the studded red gauntlets of her opponent.

"Armor everywhere, lucky bastard." She scoffs enviously.

Link shrugs and walks forward shield directly in front. "If I can just make her fall…" Nabooru slashes madly giving ground against the shiny arm mounted wall. "She won't get hurt." Link makes his move. He leaps at the retreating Gerudo with his trademark two handed slash. "Stumble…" He commands silently.

His prayer goes unanswered. Instead of retreating further and slipping on the sand Nabooru has decided to meet Link halfway. She joins him in the air and showcases the Gerudo signature slash. She spins, knocking Link's sword out of the way and lands a strike. Continuing the attack she scores another hit with her other blade that brings him down to the ground on his back hard. She lands with one foot on top of him with one sword at his face.

"Nabooru is the winner!"

"You win." Link says from beneath Nabooru's foot. "Let me up."

"Good fight. I thought you were better though." She helps him up. "Get this man some medicine!" Medicine is procured and Link feels a bit better.

"That was fun…" Link thinks sarcastically as the sting of the antiseptic sets in. "I almost don't completely regret that…not!" He turns to address his hostess. "I guess I'll be going." He says limping off.

"You should stay and watch. I fight the winner of the-" But Link has already left.

X

On Hyrule Field Link is calling Epona. Walking actually was a big mistake and he's paying the price by falling to his knees nearly passing out. As the mount makes her normal, prompt arrival he staggers to his feet one more time.

"This is worse than yesterday." Link thinks darkly. "At this rate visiting Ruto will make me a Zora prince. I'm skipping that no matter what Darunia said." He mounts Epona with a good deal of difficulty. "Give them a second chance. Yeah that worked. Now I'm battered and lacerated." Epona begins to walk. "Wait'll Malon hears this."

X

At Lon Lon Ranch Malon is in the yard singing in the moonlight. A favorite pastime of hers it is just past seven thirty and the moon has just risen.

"Wonder where Fairy Boy is with my horse?" The redhead wonders. "He'd better not-what in tarnation?"

Epona clops in with someone hanging off her. The rider looks to be in pretty bad shape. Malon runs over to investigate and finds just whom she was speaking of.

"Speak of the devil- what done got hol' of you?" She asks, noting the bruises from the Deku Seeds and his blood-soaked clothing. "You still with me?"

"Yeah…" Link replies, sliding the rest of the way out of the stirrups. "…Just tired." His knees buckle and he collapses onto the ground.

X

When Link wakes up he's in the same bed he was in that morning. This is still a cause of mystery for him as this is the second time he's been brought here and doesn't remember.

"Huh?" Link looks around. "How?" He notices he's wearing his Kokiri tunic.

"Epona brought you in." Malon says entering the room. "You were all cut up an bruised. You passed out. I carried you in here an changed that suit you had on. That one was the only one you had half decent. The other was burnt up, had to throw them both out. Had to stitch you up 'cause you was still leakin'. You been sleep a while." She sits down next to him on the bed. "Now tell me what happened."

Link tells her what happened from beginning to end. Her reactions range from surprise to anger at what just happened. She does not understand it all that well because it doesn't actually make any sense.

"You been takin' a pretty bad run of things lately." Malon says when he finishes. "But bad advice don't help much."

"But you don't-" Link begins.

"Understand? Understand what? You looked like you lost a fight with a tornado the last two times I done seen you! You had better leave them people alone. Don't look like they know how to treat nobody."

"But!"

"Come on out here, stretch your legs." Malon walks out. Link follows her. She takes her place in the center of the yard in the moonlight. "Now what were you sayin'?"

"But I can't just not visit them!"

"I don' see why not."

"They'll think I don't like them!"

"I don' see why you do." Malon says simply. "I'm still tryin to figure that one out."

Link is speechless. Mouth agape no sound coming out. He wants to defend his choice but cannot think of a thing to say. Considering the events of the day he has to admit it does sound pretty darn dumb.

"My mother said that people should be nice and treat each other with respect." Malon continues. "She used to stand here and sing too. She said horses were nicer than people. Now I think she's right."

"You don't know them! They're nice once you get to know them!"

"You ain't said a single nice thing about one of em that I done heard."

"But-"

"Just settle down. Sit down and take it easy. You took some pretty bad scrapes."

Link is quiet and he stops straining his mind trying to continue the argument. It isn't even that important to him right now. Thinking about it why even bother with it? He looks up at the full moon and breathes easy. "You know what?" He says at length.

"What?"

"Moonlight makes those magic beans grow."

Malon giggles. "Be serious."

"I am. They really do grow into flying lily pads. It takes about seven years but still I'd be careful if I were you."

"What do you mean?"

"I wouldn't be standing in the moonlight if I were you."

"Like this?" Malon says opening her mouth wide staring at the moon. "Ahh…"

"Nope, wouldn't advise it." Link says studying the satellite some more.

"I see why." Malon says calmly.

"Because it's silly?"

"Because I just shouldn't."

"Hmm?" Link looks back at Malon. Or up as it would so have happened. Malon is twenty-five feet tall. "Can this day get any worse?" He wonders backing away eyes wide. "I'm beginning to have my doubts."

"Don' be afraid." Booms from above him. The horses are alarmed now.

"She can't be serious! The horses have the right idea!" Link begins stepping backwards quickly.

"I won' hurt you." The earth quakes as she takes a step in his direction.

Link's eyes bug out even more as Malon in motion is taken in through them. He is stunned and very nearly terrified. He turns to bolt.

"Just wait." Malon says plaintively. "Please."

Link stops. "She's scared too." He realizes. He turns to look at her. "I can't leave her like this." He waits at the gate.

"Thank you." Malon whispers. She walks towards him.

It takes all of Link's willpower to stand his ground as her ponderous form moves towards him. All the other horses run away and sit at the extreme other end of the enclosure; some jumping the fence but Link holds his position. He double takes a bit as she tries to sit next to him, eyes glued to her at the critical moment she hovers above him. He knows true terror then but it passes in an eye blink as she situates herself next to him easily.

"You know, I think you were right." Malon says trying to make light of the situation. "Moonlight just might've made those beans grow."

"I-is that so?" Link asks trying to calm his nerves.

"Yep. Sure is somethin' isn't it?"

"Y-yeah. Suppose Talon heard?"

"Nope. He can sleep through you beatin' him with a stick."

There is silence for a while. Malon is sitting there looking around thinking. Link is staring at her.

"What the heck just happened?" Link wonders. "I must have missed something. This can't be right. Stuff like this doesn't just happen!" He continues to stare at Malon. "I'm looking but I can't believe my eyes…I must be losing it."

"Well if this ain't a big surprise?" Malon thinks to herself. "Can't say I was lookin' forward to this happenin'. Sure can't fit in the farmhouse now." Malon glances at Link. "Fairy boy's fixin' to burn holes in me the way he's eyeballin' me. He might be a tad more surprised than me though and I guess I understand that. Still feel like I'm on the spot." She smiles a bit. "I better get used to that."

"Are you all right?" Link asks at length.

"No, not really." Malon admits. "I'm scared of what's gonna happen next. I'm sad the horses are afraid of me. I even feel a little lonely cause you're afraid of me too, standing way over there."

"It'll be all right." Link says unsteadily.

"You don' have to be afraid of lil' ole me. I'm just a big softie."

Link walks over to Malon and leans against her. She places a hand over him. He flinches a bit then relaxes. "She's only Malon." He realizes. "Nothing scary there." This insight brings him tranquility and he unwinds somewhat.

"See, I don' bite." Malon reassures him.

Link nods. "It'll be alright." He agrees.

"Nice of you to say that, Fairy boy. It's somethin' I really need to hear. Fairy boy?" Malon looks down at Link. The weathered hero is fast asleep leaning on her. She smiles. "Thanks anyways."


	3. Link's New Job

In the horse enclosure Link is sleeping sitting beside Malon as the cockcrows. He's leaning against her and looks uncomfortable but when you are a professional at being lazy you know how to do it whenever and wherever you want.

"Wake up." Malon cajoles. "Fairy boy time to get up." Link remains asleep. "He went through heck yesterday; I guess he's too tired." She looks around as the farm comes to life. "But someone has to do the mornin' chores. I can't but I think he can help me." She shakes him gently. "Come on wake up."

Link fidgets and tries to roll over. "No…go away…" He tries to push Malon's hand away. An exercise in futility as he only succeeds in moving himself. He slides over and hits the ground next to her.

Malon giggles as he continues his antics. "Goofy…" She whispers as he reaches for a blanket to pull over himself. "Get up." She says decisively prodding him a bit more.

Link rolls over onto his back and pushes the imaginary bedcover away from his face and opens his eyes. A grumpy Hylian stares up at Malon. His expression changes from irritation to befuddlement as he beholds the form of his tormentor. His eyes automatically shut tight after coming to the conclusion that it's been only two seconds and they want a break.

"I must be dreaming…" He says rubbing his face and looking again. "This can't be real…" He closes his eyes but immediately opens them a third time because he's been poked again. He looks hard at her smiling face then at the finger pressing him. Peepers locked on the farm girl he wraps his hands around the digit. "Hold on…" He says as he notes its solidity. "You…"

"Good mornin' lazy boy." Malon says gaily.

"Wha…" All the color drains from Link's face as his eyes roll to the back of his head and he faints.

"I guess wakin' up early don' sit too well with him." Malon says to herself fetching a bucket of water. "I don't suppose I'm that easy ta wake up to either." She smiles then dribbles water on the unconscious savior of Hyrule.

"B-b-b!" Link founders under the stream. He sits up and looks around. "I know I took some pretty heavy damage yesterday. A lot of blood loss." He says aloud. "There was no way that could've been real."

"Then don' turn round." Comes a voice from behind Link. "I don' want you fallin' out on me again."

"Huh?" Link says standing. "Malon?"

"Yep, now I said don' turn round. Listen first."

Link nods. "You've got my attention." His back is still to Malon and he's looking as though he's in deep thought. Of course all of this is hard to tell from behind.

"I don' know how to phrase it any other way but you wasn't dreamin' that's all I can say."

"So you're telling me you are like the dream I just had."

"Mm hm."

"And you're…bigger."

"To say the least." She replies with a giggle.

"You've got to be-" Link turns around. "Oh."

"Hi there." Malon smiles down from her full twenty-five foot height with the bucket hanging from her pinky finger. It's almost cute…except that it can't possibly be true. She can see Link wrestling with the idea visibly and giggles again.

"And I'm not dreaming?" Link asks one last time just to be sure.

"Nope. All of me is just as real as the ground you're standin' on."

"Okay." Link replies.

Thirty minutes and several pails later Link and Malon are talking. After managing to rouse the young man and keep him with her long enough to not pass out she explains what she needs him to do.

"It's too early in the morning for this." Link complains.

"But I need your help." Malon says. "Please help me out."

"I wasn't talking about the work. I was talking about you! Least you could do is give a guy a warning…"

"I tried that." Malon giggles. "Every time you'd turn round and pass out anyhow."

"What do I have to do?" Link asks impatiently embarrassed at having fainted so many times.

"To start you got to feet the cows and cuccos. Then milk em and collect the eggs. Then clean the stables and the henhouse."

"All that?"

"It ain't all that much. If a lil ole country gal can do it you can too."

Link grumbles about how it isn't fair and gets to work. Malon watches carefully correcting and guiding the hired help at every turn. After a while he actually finishes the morning chores. You'd think it was an Olympic accomplishment with the amount of fatigue he seemed to have afterward.

"Whew, that's done!" Link plops down on the ground. "I'm pooped!"

"Then I guess I'll let you wait a while before you start the afternoon chores." Malon replies. "You didn't do too bad…"

"Afternoon chores?" Link groans.

"You didn't think that was it did you?" Malon asks incredulously.

"One can hope."

"Runnin' a farm is a full-time job. Always somethin' to do." Malon grins. "I'll make a ranch hand outta you yet!" Link groans again and flops on his back.

X

In Kokiri Forest Saria is looking for Link. She's got something to tell him and hasn't found him yet. A cause to wonder about for the eternally young Kokiri girl to be sure.

"I wonder where Link is..." Saria says to herself. "Looks like he wasn't here again last night…" She walks into the Lost Woods. "I was able to get a rematch out of Mido but now our star player is nowhere to be found. I guess he'll turn up. I'll just have to postpone the match until then."

X

At Lon Lon Ranch Link has just completed the afternoon chores. Another Herculean effort if you ask him and now he's beat once again. But his large supervisor is cutting him some slack, after all he did get the living crap beaten out of him only yesterday.

"Okay, now I'm done." Link collapses onto terra firma. "How do you do this all day?" He asks from the ground.

"You get used to it." Malon replies. "It's nothing really."

"I'm so tired I could sleep for a week!"

"Not before evening chores." She says sitting down.

"Don't remind me. Ugh. Fighting monsters is easier than this."

"The big hero wants to go get some monsters, that's a big surprise. I don' see how you deal with em myself, can't stand em."

"You get used to it." Link says back at her. "It's nothing really."

"Funny."

"Talon didn't care too much about what happened, why is that?" Link asks.

"Not much bothers pa. He was more upset he'd have to start cookin' again than he was about havin' me around." Malon looks at the farmhouse. "That's just his way."

"Exactly how tall are you? That's been on my mind all day."

"I wonder myself. How can we figure it?"

"That's easy. Where's a tape measure?"

"In there but you need somebody to hold it at the top and read at the bottom for accurate measurin' right?"

"Yeah, but we can make do." Link returns with the tape and two pieces of wood.

"What are you gonna do with those?"

"Just lie down. I'll show you."

"Okay." Malon lies down on her back. "Like this?"

"That's fine." Link walks over to her head. "Be still please." He places a plank against her cranium then one against her feet. "Roll sideways for me. Don't move the wood."

"Which way?"

"Any way." Malon moves and he walks the distance between the sticks marveling at how he can count paces walking her height. "Sure are tall." He remarks stretching the tape.

"Maybe." She says amiably. "Thought you might've missed it."

"Twenty-seven feet tall to be exact. Actually a little over that but that's what we'll call it."

"Wow…"

"How tall were you before?"

"About five six."

"That makes you…" Link does some fast math. "Five times your normal height."

"That'll explain my appetite." Malon laughs.

"What have you eaten today?"

"Leftovers from your parade. Since we brought the food we took back what was left. There isn't much now though." The big girl looks guilty.

"We'll need to come up with something or you could end up starving."

"With you around I won't starve." Malon giggles and Link pales visibly. "I'm sure you'll think of something."

X

In Hyrule Castle Princess Zelda impatiently waits for Link. She paces the throne room awaiting him now thoroughly annoyed.

"Where is he?" Zelda wonders pacing. "I was sure he'd be back today."

"It is late your majesty, I should be going."

"I know Calle but he should be here. Link of all people should know his adventure is hard to keep in order. He should've known you would need clarification…"

"You should allow her to go." Impa says. "I doubt he shall be by tonight."

"…you are right. Calle, you may go."

"Thank you your graciousness." Calle bows.

"I will have him here tomorrow I am certain."

"Most appreciated." Calle takes her leave.

X

At Lon Lon Ranch the sun is about to set. The end of the day has nearly arrived and at least one person is worn out.

"Alright, what are these evening chores?" Link asks resolutely. "I'm ready."

"Just put the horses in for the night. I usually do before bed but last night…" Malon trails off.

"Anything else?"

"Nope just that…" His companion sounds despondent.

"Is something wrong?" Link asks concerned.

"The horses are still frightened of me…that makes me sad."

"Oh, um well let's see…" Link walks over to Epona. "Hey girl, come over here. Come on follow me." The filly balks. "Come on, please?"

"It's no use. I guess I'm too scary." Malon's eyes glisten with unshed tears.

"No, now work with me!" Link demands. "Sing her song."

"O-okay." Malon begins to sing Epona's song.

"Come on. That's the way." Link leads Epona to Malon. "Be calm, you know her. She's just really big."

Malon hugs Epona lightly. "Aren't you my favorite?" Though Epona is the size of a dog by comparison she is comfortable as her owner strokes her. "You're a good girl."

"Sit down. I think some others want attention." Link mentions. "But you're just a little imposing standing."

Malon nods without breaking song and sits. Other horses clop over cautiously toward her now that she's sitting. Soon friends surround her. The girl looks perfectly at home with them all and can't be happier.

"I can wait to take them in." Link says leaning on the gate. "No hurry." Malon nods and continues to bond with the horses.

X

In Gerudo Valley Nabooru is sitting looking to the horizon in the desert. The endless sandstorm rages and in all the dust the dusk falling is nearly obscured.

"I didn't give Link enough credit yesterday." She remarks skyward. "The winner of the tournament couldn't touch me once. He is actually very good since he nearly beat me. What did I expect? Everyone wants to see us go again. I want to go again. He seemed a bit off; he'd probably be even tougher!" She sighs.

"But he didn't even come by today to see who won. I didn't even get a chance to ask him for another go. I only want another good round, I had no idea that he was the only worthy opponent."

X

At Lon Lon Ranch Link and Malon are sitting talking. There is nothing left to do and that is fine by the freshly hired help.

"Isn't this strange?" Malon says suddenly. "This happenin' like it did?"

"Sort of." Link replies. "It is unexpected."

"I'm sorry; you need to speak up some. I'm up here." She chides. "Can't hear you."

"Sort of." He repeats louder. "It was unexpected."

"Why don't you sit on the roof? Then we could talk face to face."

"Sure, fine idea." The holder of all tools whips out his trusty hookshot and is on the roof pretty fast. "Can you here me now?"

"Mm hm." Malon looks up at the stars. "Who would've thunk it though?"

"I sure didn't. The guy who sold the beans to me was chewing them up. Never in my wildest dreams…"

"I could've dreamed it up. I did if you want to know."

"Huh?"

"My mother told me dreams were one of three things: something you want to happen, something you don' want to happen, or something that's gonna happen. Last night happened just like in my dream."

"This is exactly the way it happened?"

Malon nods. "Right down to a T."

"Well it was an event seven years in the making. You dreamed it would happen then it did. Maybe it was destined to occur?" Link shrugs. "I'm no fortune teller."

"I wonder if it'll turn out for the best."

"No way to tell. We can only live it out."

"And hope." Malon adds.

Link nods. "We should turn in." He moves to hang from the eaves and drop. He's surprised to feel hands around his midsection lower him to the ground. "…" Malon smiles at him as he goes to the farmhouse.

X

Link awakens to tapping on his window. It's like the night flew by and morning took the express route because he's still wiped out somewhat.

"What?" Link looks out the glass pane. He can see Malon tapping it. "Morning already?" He walks outside.

"Good mornin'." Malon says to her assistant. "Ready to get started?" Link nods and they begin.

First he lets the horses out and feeds the cuccos and the cows. Then he milks the cows and collects the eggs. But he has trouble cleaning the stables. A He-man Link is not and he nearly throws his back out for trying.

"Damn, straw is heavy." Link groans trying to move a bale. "Shoveling it out got me tired and my back still hurts." He tries to boost the bundle with all his might. "Damn it, ow!"

"Let me help." Malon says noting Link's difficulty. She steps over the corral gate to the stable. "Too heavy?" He nods and she moves it with one hand then lays it out with the other.

"Thanks. I'm so sore from yesterday it isn't funny." Link attempts to stand. He and Quasimodo share a standing posture in common now.

"You look like a sway backed nag limpin' round like that." Malon says watching Link lurch about ungainly.

"I feel like one."

"Hold it right there. You need a rubdown before you cramp up all over." The colossal country gal sits down and gestures at the hero. "Let me help you."

"I can take it. I just need some rest."

"You'll wake up lookin' like a half dead garden snake." Malon warns.

Link considers the consequences. "I hurt like heck now and it's going to get worse. Or I could have Malon help me and be snapped like a twig. She won't do it on purpose but does she know her own strength?"

Malon can see Link pondering. "I promise you'll be happy you let me help you." She says confidently.

"What have I got to lose?" Link concludes. "She just wants to help. She doesn't want to see me hurt." He nods his assent.

Seeing this Malon picks Link up in both hands and places him in her lap. Then she begins to massage his back and shoulders after removing his tools from him.

Tense at first Link was startled to find that Malon was surprisingly gentle. An easy yet firm set of soft hands were taking the pain out of his body gradually. It was a pleasantly different occurrence unlike anything he had ever experienced before. The event was relaxing to a fault and he drifted off to sleep.

Malon was just taking her time. She noted the cramped corded muscles in his arms and legs from so much fighting. How his back was naturally inclined forward because of all the equipment. "All this stuff is jus' too much to be luggin' round all the time." She says continuing. "It'll ruin your back, Link. Link?" Now she notes his lack of presence in the conversation. "Lazy fairy boy…" She finishes the massage and looks at him for a while. "Anytime's naptime for them elf kids." She says to herself leaving him rest in the crook of her arm.

X

In Kokiri Forest Saria is climbing a ladder. She's on a mission and Link is it. She's hot up the ladder to the only tree house in the forest to find him and complete her objective.

"We're going to show Mido and the boys what for this time!" Saria thinks to herself. "Just as soon as Link's ready we're taking them down!" She reaches the top of the ladder then walks into Link's house.

"What a messy house…where's Link?" Saria wonders aloud.

"I was hoping you could tell me?" Says a voice.

"Impa!" Saria gasps. "You scared the daylights out of me!"

"Sorry." The Shadow Sage says apologetically. "I was sent to get Link. He is wanted at the castle you see. However I found that he wasn't here. I thought you might be him climbing the ladder."

"Zelda's looking for him too? I was looking for him myself. I had something he could help me with. How long have you been waiting?"

"Maybe ten minutes. I never knew Link to be an early riser though."

"He isn't." Saria says flatly. "If he wasn't here he must be where he was the last two nights."

"Last two nights?"

"For the last couple of days he hasn't been home. Last time I saw him was two days ago. He came from where he went and was here for a little while then returned there is my guess. This makes the third day he's been gone."

"Indeed. Come with me. Tell your story to the princess. Perhaps we can figure something out together."

X

Link is in Hyrule castle. It's a heck of a time for an impromptu visit and he's wondering about it himself.

"How'd I get here?" Link wonders inside the throne room. "Zelda." He spots the Hylian princess. "Saria." The Sage of the Forest is there as well as the leaders of the Gerudo and Zora. "Nabooru, Ruto what's up?"

The ladies say nothing. They advance and circle around him. Although they're smiling Link can't help but feel apprehensive. Something isn't right and it sure isn't the royal décor.

"Hello, anyone?" Link says voice echoing throughout the cavernous room.

No response. They continue to circle around then suddenly they rush him. They grab his arms and begin to tug. Now he's being pulled in several directions and he still doesn't have any idea what's going on.

"Hey, ow! What's the big idea?" Link demands taking an unwanted stretching. "Quit it!"

This gets a reaction. Now they are all talking at once, all of their voices in Link's ears. Talking louder and louder he can't understand and after so much straining cries out.

"Stop it! Leave me alone!"

But they don't listen. They just yell and tug harder. Link can't take much more abuse. He's considering finding a new circle of friends at this point if they are all actually nuts but that's when the throne room door flies open.

"Link? What are you doing to Link?" Comes from the archway. Hurried footfalls are heard and soon a large angry Malon looms over the sages.

"Help!" Pleas the human rubber band.

"Let him go this minute!" Malon demands. "How can you do this to him? He ain't no dog that do tricks! He can't be everythin' ya'll want him to be because that's what you want! He can't stand any of this and you just take advantage?" She picks up the battered ranch hand. "Ya'll should be ashamed." She walks out.

Looking up at his huge heroine enfolded in her arms Link feels a sense of peace as she smiles down at him. It's enough to make him feel at ease despite the dislocated joints.

"Are you alright? Sorry I was late, had a tough time catchin' up to you."

Link nods. "Just glad to see you…" Then his eyes close.

"Are you awake?" Link shakes his head. "You got to be awake if you're shakin' your head!" Malon giggles.

Link's eyes open. "Huh?"

"You here with me now?" Malon asks. "You said somethin'."

"What? What did I say?"

"'Just glad to see you.' Were you havin' a nightmare?"

"Yes, no I mean…" Then Link proceeds to relate the dream, because that's what it must have been.

"Oh." Malon says as he finishes. "And I was holdin' you in my arms?"

"Yeah. I felt safe and content."

"Like now?" Malon asks grinning.

"Uh…" As it just so happens Link is held securely in Malon's embrace very exactly like in the dream. So instead of vocally responding he turns the color of his old Goron tunic.

"I'll take that as a yes." Malon laughs. "Nothin' wrong with it! I'll hold you if you want. I kind of like it too. It gives me a warm fuzzy feelin', you know?" Link nods. "You can go back to sleep if you want, I don't mind. You won't miss afternoon chores." He groans and takes her up on her offer falling back to sleep immediately. "Such a lazy boy…"

X

In Hyrule castle Zelda and Saria are talking. They are comparing stories and trying to piece together the path of the wayward defender of the land. They aren't getting too far though.

"So he's been gone for the last three days?" Zelda repeats after hearing what Saria told Impa. "I haven't seen him."

"I wonder where he is." Impa says to herself. "His disappearance is admirably well-executed."

"Where who is?" Calls a voice from the entrance to the throne room. "What are you guys talking about?"

"Ah Nabooru, have you seen Link?" Zelda asks.

"No, came here looking for him." The Sage of Spirits replies. "You guys looking for him too?"

"Yeah." Saria says. "He hasn't been home for the last three days."

"We have some things we need him for." Zelda says.

"No kidding. I need a rematch with the guy."

"Where else could he be?" Impa wonders.

"You think Ruto has seen him? We've covered about everywhere else." Saria suggests.

Zelda shrugs. "It is worth an effort. From here we are still fruitless so any alternative should be entertained."

"I can't see why he'd be hanging out with her." Nabooru says. "I don't know."

"Well, they are engaged." Impa says pointedly.

"Really? Must've missed that."

"The whole thing's silly if you ask me." Saria mumbles.

"So we're headed to Zora's domain?" Zelda asks. They nod and then they disappear in a green flash as the Hylian princesses Farore's Wind spell carries them away.

X

On the ranch Malon is sitting holding Link and watching the horses. Not having to do anything is growing on her since she's got a replacement right there.

"Almost time for afternoon chores." Malon says looking down at her hired help. "But I don' have the heart to wake him. I'll let him sleep a little longer." She sits content for a while until a familiar feeling comes over her.

"Oh, well it is around that time." Malon says standing. "What's to eat?" She checks around. "Nothin'…that ain't good." Her stomach growls. "Maybe Link can help me." She tries to rouse him.

"Huh, oh hi." Link says groggily. "I wasn't sleeping. I was working, honest."

"Sure you were." Malon replies smiling. "Could you help me with something?"

"Uh huh." He replies yawning.

"I'm hungry."

Link's face falls and he turns white as a sheet. "Uh…" He tries to escape Malon's grasp.

"No silly, not you!" Malon says cheerily. "I mean can you go get me something to eat?"

"Yeah, sure I can try." Link replies with the color returning to his face. "Had me going for a minute there."

"Well I'm not sayin' you wouldn't be tasty but I'm in the mood for something else." Malon laughs.

"Right." Link says unsteadily. "How much do you want?"

"Bring back as much as you can, I missed breakfast." She sets Link down. "Take the cart over there. Hurry back."

"I'll do what I can. Stay hidden until I come back. I'll whistle." Malon nods and Link rides off.

X

In Zora's Domain Ruto listens to the story of the other sages. It is a meeting of the minds and not very much has happened since their arrival but still. They are all playing the detective game trying to put together a timeline and doing a lackluster job of it.

"So you cannot find my beloved?" Ruto says, worried. "Why does this happen to me?"

"It is as though he's dropped from the face of the world." Impa replies. "I'm impressed."

"This is terrible!" Ruto wails. "We're engaged you know."

"Yes, we know." Everyone says tiredly.

"When is the last time you saw Link?" Saria asks anxious to get back on topic.

"Three days ago. I found him in Lake Hylia floating in the late afternoon."

"We have all seen him two days prior." Zelda says. "Your last meeting with him was a fortnight past?"

"Yes."

"Let's put together his steps." Nabooru suggests. "Two days ago we all saw Link. Except you." She points at the Zora princess who nods. "Who saw him first?"

"I saw him in the afternoon." Zelda says.

"I saw him in the morning." Saria mentions.

"While I saw him at dusk." Nabooru concludes. "Since I saw him last he probably went to where he's been going to instead of home after we left. Any ideas?"

"Who really keeps track of Link?" Zelda asks.

"He's as slippery as an eel. The mark of a skilled Sheikah." Impa agrees.

"He doesn't even visit me…" Ruto mopes, beginning to sob somewhat vocally.

"I wonder why?" Nabooru murmurs under her breath. "Any ideas at all?" She asks again.

"After he left me he went to Goron City!" Saria remembers suddenly. "Maybe Darunia knows!"

"He is Link's sworn brother." Zelda states.

"It's worth a shot." Nabooru shrugs.

"The last clue we have." Impa remarks wistfully. "Well played Link." Ruto whimpers pitifully and she sniffs and looks hopeful at the last prospect.

After a quick vote Zelda summons her magic and all the sages gather around. Then just as suddenly as they came they leave for Death Mountain.

X

In Hyrule Market Link is looking around for food vendors. With no shortage of merchants with stands selling every kind of food from potatoes to raw fish it isn't that hard. The fact that he has no idea what half of this stuff is (not having had a mother that made him try these things) and no clue how much to buy is the main issue here.

"How much could she possibly eat?" Link wonders. "She said fill this cart but it's a two horse carriage. It isn't small." He shrugs. "But better it than I. Wouldn't want her chewing on me." He walks up to a market stand.

"Hi, what can I get you?" Asks the merchant. "Hey, aren't you-"

"Yeah." Link cuts him off. "Never mind all that." He looks at the stand and all the food on display carefully considering his options. "Let me get…everything."

"Everything? That's a lot of-" The salesman sounds dubious.

"I can pay. Could you load it into my carriage?"

"Yes, that will come to-"

"Is this enough?" Link drops three purple rupees on the stand.

"Thank you! I'll have it loaded right away!"

"I'll be back in a few minutes." Link walks off.

"Yes sir!" The ecstatic salesman replies to the retreating form that is his most profitable customer ever.

Link doesn't pay him anymore attention though. Something has just struck him and he's got one more thing to do before he leaves the castletown. Heading over to the home of the only tailor in Hyrule the mighty savior of the nation has a request of the threadmaster. This is not well received by the expert fabric artist however and they are arguing in short order.

"I will not!" The clothes maker declares. "A waste of my talent!"

"Bind it with twine and make it to last." Link says ignoring his objections.

"There is no call for my skill! I am an artist not a-!" Link shushes him. "Do not shush me boy! Have you no respect?"

"You are taxing my patience." Link thinks as he rolls his eyes and puts a hand to his forehead. "Stop being difficult." He says flatly. "Will you be done by tomorrow?"

"There is no way that I would-oh!" Two golden rupees fall on the table. The experts eyes gleam with the shine of the jewels.

"Will you be done by tomorrow?"

"Of course sir!"

"Thank you."

X

In the cow barn Malon is kind of compact. It was quite the endeavor to get inside of the building and having obtained entry through ripping her dress a bit and knocking her elbow on the doorway it only proved one thing. It was not roomier on the inside as previously suspected. Not with all the cows and other things and a pitchfork sticking her somewhere she'd rather not be stuck leaving a second rip in her garment.

"When is he gonna get back? It's kinda tight in here." Malon complains. "Had to shove all the crates out of here to fit plus that damn fork…" She finds it and stabs it deep into the wall out of spite. "Why would he leave it right there?"

"I'm famished too." She shifts and the cows low in protest. "Quit, I'm trying to get comfortable." She hears a loud whistle. "Darn it I jus'-" She slips out of the barn with some difficulty, nearly splitting the sleeve of her clothing completely in the process. "Hey."

"I can't believe you actually fit in there." Link says riding up with the food 'cart'. "Though not without some kind of loss…"

"Me neither." Malon agrees, looking at her somewhat bare arm. "Ah well, what did you get me?"

"Your favorite. Vetagebles!" Link uncovers the cart with a flourish.

"Vegetables." Malon corrects. "And fruit and bread, what did you do buy a market stand?"

"Yeah, it's all I could think up." Link says guiltily. "Did you want something in particular?"

"No! I was jus' curious. Must've cost a fortune!"

Link shrugs. "What's money for?"

"Thank you." The oversized girl begins to eat.

"She really is putting it away." He thinks. "Will there be enough for later? I spent 150 on it I hope so…"

"I was empty!" Malon says between bites. "That hits the spot." She stops. "Should be enough till tomorrow, thanks again."

"Good…so can I get out of afternoon chores?"

She shakes her head. "Someone has to do it. If Ingo hadn't quit…"

"I'm kidding. But how did you manage to fit in there?"

"That I can' tell you. Why'd I have to?"

"Well you don't want people seeing you without me around to explain. They may run away screaming all sorts of things-"

"Or fall out on the ground." Malon laughs.

"Or that yes. Are you ready for that? Do you want other people to know about you?"

"Not yet." Malon confesses. "I'm still getting used to this."

"See? We'll deal with that when you're good and ready, agreed?" She nods.

X

In Goron City Darunia is in the hot seat. A certain group of ladies has come to call and they've got questions for him. The inquisition has him quite jumpy to begin with.

"So have you seen Link?" Zelda asks the Goron chieftain.

"Yeah, a couple days ago…why?" Darunia replies nervously to the gals.

"What did he say to you?" Nabooru asks.

"Confidential. Man to man talk, can't tell you ladies." The avatar of the volcano says gruffly.

"Is that so?" Saria asks. "What was it about?"

"Love to tell you but I don't think my sworn brother would like it too much." He laughs heartily. "Can't help you!"

"You're going to tell me…" Ruto says threateningly. "Or we'll see if you can swim."

"Swim? Gorons can't oh…" He catches Ruto's meaning.

"Are you ready to tell us or should we visit the lake in person?" Nabooru asks.

"I really shouldn't tell you…"

"That is beside the point." Zelda states. "What did he say?"

"Uh…" Ruto begins to glow. "He said something about a red-haired girl!" Darunia says hurriedly.

"Where?" The Zora princess demands.

"I don't know! He didn't say! She listens to him, that's all I know!"

"That's enough." Impa says suddenly. "Stop scaring Darunia, Ruto."

"But-"

"He doesn't know anything else, isn't it obvious?"

"Link-"

"Didn't leave much of a trail. He's slipped our pursuit of him two days ago. He's tricky."

"Do any of you know any redheads?" Nabooru asks. "I haven't seen any." Everyone else shakes their heads.

"He's avoiding us." Ruto says flatly. "Whoever this person is has somewhere for him to hide out."

"Our last lead just went up in smoke." Saria says. "Why would he want to avoid us though? Do you think it's-"

"I can't imagine why." Zelda says. "The fact remains that he is. We can't find a trace of him anywhere and he hasn't shown up or spoken to any of us."

"The only remaining clue is a red-haired girl." Impa concludes. "If we find her we find Link." Everyone nods and they disappear in a green flash of magic.

"Man I wouldn't want to be Link right now." Darunia mumbles. "Hell hath no fury…good luck brother."

X

On the farm Link is having an easy time of it. Having persuaded Malon that if he continues to do all the work without her help he could break his stitches she decided to give him a bit of a hand.

"These chores are a breeze now." Link says idly.

"Of course, now that I'm helpin'." Malon replies. "Lazy."

"You can lift more than I can." Link says. "Why not help?"

"What if I like watching you sweat?"

"Eh." Link says dismissively. "Give me a hand up." Malon lifts Link over the fence. He rounds up the horses and stables them.

"You're lazy." Malon says as he comes back out.

"We knew that. Elves are lazy." Link says nonchalantly.

"I'm not makin' it better."

"No, you're not." He plops down next to her.

"I shouldn't have started helpin' you."

"You're a big softie."

"I didn't quite catch that. Could you get on the roof again?"

"Hand up?" Link says loudly.

"Come on!" Malon looks down at him. "You're a Hylian!"

"Raised by Kokiri so there." Link replies smugly.

Malon sighs. "You're getting' used to this." She places him on the roof.

"You bet! I've always had to do everything myself. That is very tiresome. Walk everywhere, fight without assistance, tend my own wounds…everything. Having a hand for a change is appreciated even if it's doing stuff I don't normally do."

"How did such a lazy boy save Hyrule?" Link shrugs then there is silence for a while. They gaze at the sunset thinking about things.

"This is the weirdest thing." Malon thinks to herself. "I'm five times my natural height. Why me? Why not the princess or someone else? Is there somethin' special I'm supposed to do? I've got no idea. They say there is a reason for everthin' but…" She glances over at Link.

"He's been real good about all this. After the first shock he's been as helpful as can be. I don't know where I'd be without him right now." She thinks back to earlier. "He dreamed about me holdin' him, not hard to see where that falls. He wanted it to happen I'm sure. It looks like even the big hero needs someone to hold him every now and again."

"I can't believe this is happening." Link thinks to himself. "Who would've thought that a childish dare would turn out like this? It's enough to make you laugh." He is just about to do that when he glances at Malon.

"But she doesn't think it's so funny. She was so scared when it happened I can't believe I was actually going to leave her like that. I felt so low right then, leaving her after all she's done for me. Lend me her horse, tend my wounds, and let me rest all free of charge. I've cried on her shoulder and when she needed someone to lean on I very nearly wasn't there. She isn't like the others, she accepts me for who I am. She doesn't demand stupid things of me, she doesn't demand at all matter of fact. Even when she had to be starving and she was in a position to make me do whatever she wanted she **asked **me to help her. What's more, she needs me she actually needs me. I haven't felt this way in a long time; my actions mean something once more." He looks at her again.

"She may look kind of intimidating but she said it herself. She's just a big softie and-"

"Link?" Malon asks suddenly. "What is your favorite color?"

"Color? That's an easy one. Red."

"Why is that?"

"It's the color of courage, of fire. My favorite tunic was red."

"It looked pretty crispy. Sorry I had to throw it away."

"That's okay. There was certain red stuff that just shouldn't be on your clothes that got on it. The suit was toast." Link looks contemplative. "I'll have to buy another one come to think of it…"

"I like green. It's the color of meadows and makes me think of serenity. A little boy from the forest dressed in all green changed my life."

"Really?"

"Mm hm. Green is the color of my one true friend."

X

In Hyrule Castle Zelda is pacing around again. As is her habit when irritated she starts wearing a groove in the red carpet before the most expensive chair in the kingdom.

"Princess, you should calm down, get some rest." Impa suggests.

"What wrong have I done Link that he needs to avoid me?" Zelda inquires. "What have I done?"

"You've been nothing but hospitable I assure you."

"I give everything a person could want. Fame, banquets, a holiday even. What is my error?"

"I cannot say."

"Then why speak at all?" Zelda snaps.

"I am sorry."

"No, forgive me Impa. I was rude. I spoke harshly; it is not your fault Link is the way he is. It has me in such a mood…"

"I know." Impa says understandingly. "That is why you should get your rest. Being angry is very taxing."

"You are right. I shall go to bed straightaway."

"Don't worry about Link. I shall find him soon enough."

"That calms me. Thank you." Zelda goes to bed.

"I look forward to matching wits with you Link. Wherever you are I shall find you." Impa says to herself.

X

On the farm Link and Malon stare up at the stars. It's relatively late at night and the moon is high up in the sky.

"You sure can eat." Link says absently.

"What can I say? I'm a big girl now." Malon giggles.

"Still, that's a lot of grub."

"Can' help it."

"You'll get fat." Link warns.

"Not if you're a cheapskate!" Malon counters.

"Got me there. I guess I did cheap out on the food. Only one carriage load. Miserly me."

"I didn't mean it, I'm quite-"

"Take a joke why don't you?" The apprentice farmer laughs. "Didn't your sense of humor grow along with you?"

"Nope, just my appetite. Speaking of which you and I should get better acquainted."

"N-no, maybe you should give me a h-hand down." Link stammers. "G-got to get up early in the morning."

"Where's your sense of humor?" Malon asks picking up Link and licking her lips.

"It's on vacation right now." Link replies voice quavering.

"Oh is that so? Shame." Malon lies back.

"You're not letting me go?" Link asks apprehensively.

"It was awful cold and lonely last night. Won' you keep me company?"

"Oh, since you asked nicely. Of course." Link replies relieved. "I was thinking maybe you were going to snack on me."

"Can' you take a joke?" Malon laughs.

X

In the Kokiri Forest Saria is just come from Link's house. Having checked it for the umpteenth time and this last one just before bed she's come up with nothing. Seeing the note she left him undisturbed she's about to go home.

"Guess he isn't coming back tonight either." Saria thinks sliding down the ladder. "Wherever he is I guess he'll be there until morning." She begins to walk.

"Where is he? Why did he go there? Is it our fault? Is it something we've done?" Saria enters her house and sits down.

If it is us, what have we done? I would really like to ask him. He's never told me." The Forest Sage thinks back to earlier. "Darunia says the red-haired girl listened to him. Does that mean she knows why he's not speaking to us?" She lies down. "Honestly I just want to know."


	4. Count Mistakes Made In Good Faith

Link is taking care of the morning chores. He's getting used to it by now but the abject toil of it grates on him. He wasn't raised a manual laborer. The Deku tree didn't tell him that he was destined to move heavy things but here he is.

"Man is straw heavy!" Link thinks trying to lift the bale. "Horses should clean their own stalls!"

"Need some help?" Malon asks walking next to him. Link nods and she lifts the bale over his head and they walk toward the stable. At the stables she drops the bale on Link's head. "Whoops." She says laughing. "Let me pick that up." She gathers the straw and Link together and begins to distribute it in each stall.

"Malon! Let me go!" Link yells as straw presses into him painfully. "Malon!"

She pays him no attention and throws the straw and him into the last stall with a thud. Link staggers out of the stall frowning.

"What was that for?" He demands in visible discomfort.

"I'm sorry about that, let me help you." Malon says. She grabs Link and begins to massage him.

"That's better. Wait now you're a little rough-ow!" An audible snap is heard. "My arm!"

"I'm sorry about that. But now I'm hungry, could you get something for me to eat?"

Link storms off muttering and returns with the cart loaded down with food. Malon wastes no time and begins to eat very quickly, the carriage quaking with the speed of it.

"Hey don't you think you should slow down?" Link asks. "Wha- ouch." He's fallen back into the food. "Wait a second." He tries to clamber out but Malon gives him a hand. "Thanks wouldn't want to –HEY!" He's heading straight for her mouth. "No, don't!" The last thing he sees is her wide-open maw.

Link wakes up with a start. "Yaaah!" He shrieks looking up at Malon. "YAAHHH!" He shrieks again, going limp in her arms.

"What?" Malon asks yawning. "Did I miss something?"

X

Early in the morning in Hyrule Castle Impa is awake. The sheikah has always been one to rise early and today she has an assignment to undertake so she wants as much of a start as possible.

"Let us begin the game Link." Impa says walking from the castle. "You left one hint, red-haired girl. Let's find her." With that Impa goes off looking for this mystery person.

X

On Lon Lon Ranch Link is explaining his nightmare to Malon. He's still shaken up but he's managed to calm down.

So in the end I bite your head off?" Malon asks.

"Yeah and when I woke up and saw your mouth wide open…"

"Well I see your meanin' but let it be known." Malon pauses for emphasis. "I will not eat you." She pauses again. "Ever." She looks down at Link. "Okay?"

"That's good to hear."

"Now to the mornin' chores."

Link nods and begins. He feeds the chickens and cows pausing a bit in the cow barn. "How can she fit in here?" He wonders. Then he collects the eggs and milks the livestock. "It still doesn't make any sense to me." He says while milking the cattle. "Doesn't seem possible."

After that it's time to clean the stables. After shoveling them out he tries to bring the bundle of straw. Unable to lift it because he's tired he asks Malon for help. She obliges gladly since he's working for free she may as well help.

"Sure, let me do it." Malon says lifting the bale with one hand. "It's easy." She carries it to where Link is. She is just about to put it down when the strap she was holding it by breaks and it lands on Link.

"Ow!" Link yelps buried in straw.

"Sorry!" Malon says contritely. "Let me take care of that!"

"No, I've got it." Link replies climbing out of the straw. "Don't you help."

"Oh…okay."

Link rebundles the straw clumsily and walks into the stable. He pitches the horse bedding down and limps out. He is not in a very pleasant state but at least has gotten the job done without further injury.

"I'm really sorry; let me make it up to you." Malon says as he exits the stable. "That was my fault."

"I'm fine really."

"Please?"

"There is no need. I'm-" Her pleading eyes beg him to reconsider. "Alright." Link relents.

Malon's face lights up as she takes Link and places him across her lap. "I didn't mean to drop that on you." She mentions caressing the sore spots. "I'm sorry." She repeats.

"I know." Link replies. "You didn't do it on purpose, no need to apologize." He tenses up as she works his shoulder area but all is well and she moves elsewhere. "But if this is how you say sorry maybe…" He trails off. "Ahhh…" He sighs.

"See? It was jus' a silly dream. Why would I break your arm?" Malon moves to his legs. "How would you be able to do any work?"

"…dunno." Link replies not really paying attention. "Mmm…ow!"

"Are you alright?" Malon stops immediately. "What's wrong?"

"Think you pulled my leg out of socket…"

"Let me fix it." Malon moves to realign the joint.

"Ow!" Link says louder than before. "Stop!"

"Jus' let me finish-"

"You've done enough!"

"But I-"

"No!" Link tries to get loose. It isn't working but he's set on it now.

Malon lets him go. "It was a mistake…" She whispers.

Link doesn't reply. He hitches the horses to the cart and rides off.

X

In Gerudo Valley Nabooru is training her sword skills. Something you can find her doing any day of the week any time of the day and this time being no exception.

"Link may be good but I'm better. I proved it!" Nabooru thinks as she executes move after move. "But I get a nagging feeling that he wasn't giving it his all…like he didn't want to fight." She executes the Gerudo rising spin. "That's why I'm out here. I'm afraid he was holding back. I've got to be prepared; I won't be so lucky next time." She stops a moment.

"I wonder if the red-haired girl can fight. I bet I could take her. The odds are she isn't into it though. Maybe that's one of those things he has in common with her. He wasn't too interested in battle as far as I could tell. It might be something he's tired of. I'll ask the next time he comes by."

X

In Hyrule Market Town Impa is coming up with little in her search. She's run down all of her leads and hunches and coming close to the end of her resources and wits as well.

"Good move, Link." Impa thinks. "I've searched all of Kakariko and this town and have found no sign of her. The only possibilities are far too old for you. You may have left this as a false lead deceiving even Darunia. A powerful Shadow walker indeed you are." She catches sight of a horse drawn carriage.

"That's odd. Who would need a carriage to transport anything?" Impa takes a look at the driver. "Link you sly dog, I nearly missed you on my wild goose chase!" She begins to follow the carriage. "You must have thought it would take me longer to see through your ruse. Nicely executed but poorly timed. Ho ho ho, now the game really begins!" Impa follows him out of the castle town.

X

In Hyrule Field Link is riding leisurely through the countryside. He's taking his time with the cart load of supplies because there is no hurry.

"I really shouldn't have been so harsh on her." Link remarks to himself. "But it really hurt! She didn't need to do that to me. I was enjoying it at first but that changed pretty quickly. I can barely stand up now!"

Impa gasps from her place of hiding. The sudden intake of breath isn't lost on the carriage driver.

"I'm being followed." Link realizes. "Someone is tracking me. I don't know who or why." He listens a moment. He can hear a padded gait that closely matches his horses pace. He has the wagon stop and the soft footsteps stop as well.

"It's not a confrontation they're after." Link concludes. "They want to watch and see what I do, where I go. This is just as well. With this leg the way it is I don't think I'll be catching any spy much less fighting one."

Link rolls into the ranch. "I hope Malon remembered to hide while I was gone. Whoever this person is doesn't need to see her. Better just do the afternoon chores and leave. I'll give Talon a message to relay to her. Can't go near that barn, wouldn't do if whoever saw her like this." With that hops off the wagon and gets to work.

X

In the barn Malon is patiently waiting. She sits inside the building remaining hidden as Link had suggested.

"When is Link gonna get back?" Malon wonders. "It ain't enough room in here for me plus I'm hungry as all get out." She can hear noise outside. "Looks like he came back." She makes for the door. "Wait, I didn't hear him whistle. He told me not to come out until he whistled. I'm gonna wait."

So Malon bides her time and waits. The next thing she hears is an ocarina.

"What? That's Epona's song!" As Malon listens she can hear Link mount up with some effort then the sound of hooves retreating. "He's gone? Why didn't he come get me?" Then something occurs to her.

"He probably don' trust me no more. That dream of his done scared him bad and I ain't made it no better. I tol' him I wasn't gonna bit him. I made a couple of mistakes today but ain't no way he was gonna get bit. But he don' know that. All he knows is that clumsy me might hurt him some more." Malon eyes begin to water.

"Does that mean he won't be back? That he doesn't like me no more? I need him still! Without him I'm gonna be lonely, starved and half-crazed cause the farm'll be fallin' part." She begins to weep. "It ain't fair! I didn't want to be like this!"

X

In Zora's Domain Princess Ruto is upset. The search for Link ended in failure and her own circuit around Zora's Domain turned up nothing as well. To say she's more than a bit flustered would be pretty accurate.

"Where are you my beloved?" Ruto asks of the water. "I can only hope you are safe. You have to be! We still have so much to do together! We aren't even married yet!" She pauses.

"I won't let anything come between us. Anything. Our races may be different but that does not cloud my vision. I can clearly see that you are the one for me. So I will wait as long as it takes. When the time comes nothing shall stop us from being together. Least of all some red-haired girl of little consequence! It is written in the stars and she has no part in it!"

X

Impa is still trailing Link. Their arrival at Lon Lon Ranch was a bit unexpected but now the tracker is trying to put together the pieces of the mystery as her target rides away from the farm.

"So, you're a farm hand now?" The sheikah thinks stalking forward. "You work on the ranch? That doesn't make sense. I don't understand blowing off the princess for farm work. Manual labor over a banquet, something isn't right."

Link dismounts Epona. Impa dives into shadow to avoid his cursory glance. He walks into the Kokiri Forest.

"Going home are we? Strange…I was tracking you to see where you go at night. I've ascertained that it isn't home." An epiphany comes over Impa.

"Once again I must congratulate you another move well made." Impa thinks as Link climbs up to the treehouse. "You must've known you were being followed. I know you wouldn't be here otherwise nobody would be wondering where you are. You don't want me to know where you go at night, fair enough. I'll just pick up the trail where I left off. I'll watch you for a few minutes and make sure you don't immediately disappear then double back to the farm house."

Saria approaches Link's house. She climbs the ladder and enters. They begin to talk. The avatar of darkness smiles fiendishly.

"That should hold you." Impa chuckles. "You're a good player but we invented this game." She departs.

X

In the treehouse Link is peering out of the window with the Mirror Shield. He's looking for something and trying to be stealthy about it.

"She's still out there." Link thinks. "She's been following me for the last few hours, what does she want to know?" He ponders a moment. "I'm coming up with nothing. Zelda must've sent her but why?"

"Link?" Comes from the doorway. "We need to talk."

"Not now Saria." Link says distractedly.

"Yes now." Saria replies insistently.

"…she's gone." Link turns to his visitor. "What's the problem?"

"Did you see the note I left you?" Saria asks.

Link looks at his table. This being his first glance at the thing for at least four days he shakes his head. "No…is something wrong?"

"Are you avoiding us?" She asks without repartee.

"Us? Avoid? What are you talking about?"

"We sages. Your friends. We are friends right?"

"Yeah, you know that. What brought this on?"

"We haven't seen you for the past few days and you haven't been coming home at all…"

"I've had some…things to take care of." Link says thinking of Malon.

"We know about the red-haired girl." Saria says flatly.

"You do?" Link says incredulously. "How could they-Impa!" He realizes.

"Yeah, tell me why."

"Well we think it's because of magic beans she grew-"

"Magic beans? Grew?"

"Yeah, she got to be pretty big."

"What? I want to know why you hang out with her. What are you talking about?"

"Uh…" Link looks uncomfortable, he's made a mistake. "Nothing…"

"It's something. You're a terrible liar." Saria sits down across from Link on the floor. "You've got a lot of explaining to do."

Looking quite foolish at having given away what must have been a well-kept secret Link starts the story from the beginning.

X

Talon is just finishing up the evening chores. He's a bit peeved at having to do it himself but is more mystified as to why.

"That Link feller split without finishin'." Talon remarks stabling the horses. "I ain't done this in years." He walks over to the cow barn. "Feedin' the animals, that's what- tarnation!" He falls back and hits the wall. "You scared the heck outta me! Malon?"

Malon is curled up in a ball on the floor sobbing quietly. She's murmuring to herself and apparently can't hear him. She looks positively distraught about something.

"Malon? Are ya alright?"

His daughter uncurls a bit and he can see her tear streaked face. "Did he come back?" She whispers.

"Who?"

"Link. I was waitin' for him." She coughs out, sniffing and wiping her face.

"That guy? He cleared out a while ago."

"Did he say anything?"

"Can't rightly remember…"

"Nothin'?"

"I dunno." Talon shrugs. "Say, how'd you fit in here?"

Malon ignores the question. "He's probably mad at me. Or worse scared stiff." She addresses her father. "Give me some space; I'm gettin' out of here."

"Okay." He leaves the barn. Watching Malon exit doesn't explain how she got in there. It only serves to boggle his sleepy mind further. He shrugs and goes back into the building.

"I guess he won' be comin' back…" Malon says to herself. "Maybe it's for the best. I may be too dangerous for him to be around." Her stomach growls.

"I am positively ravenous." She spots the food cart. "I was in there waitin' for him so long I forgot to eat. At least he left the food for me." She takes the sheet covering the food off. "What's this? Writing?" She holds the bed sheet up to her face.

_Malon _

_Sorry I had to leave but I am being followed. I didn't want to risk them seeing you. I hope you aren't too worried about me. I told Talon to tell you I left so you should know this already. I left him enough money to get you food for tomorrow so remind him. I may not be back in the morning but you will see me tomorrow I'm pretty sure. Sorry to waste a bed sheet._

_Link_

_P.S. Before I forget, under the cart tied up is something you can use. Good night_.

He don' seem too mad." Malon thinks. "Followed? That's pretty strange." She reaches under the buggy. "What's this?" She finds the ropes binding it and snaps them with a touch. She moves the farm cart forward manually and her mouth drops open.

"A blanket?" Malon picks it up and it unrolls to be a thirty-five foot square. "That's so nice of him! He probably noticed it can get pretty nippy out here." She sits down to eat. "I have to remember to thank him."

X

While from her hiding place Impa's jaw is still hanging open. Her arrival was timed around the moment Malon clambered out of the barn and she's still trying to reel her chin back in off the ground.

"What the Goddesses?" Impa whispers. "My hat's off again to you Link. I don't know how you kept this to yourself. The red haired girl…" She watches Malon eat.

"She's eating enough for ten people! In one sitting! What is she, some kind of monster?" Impa thinks a second. "No, can't be. Link is the Hero of Time he doesn't like monsters too much. Nonetheless she is enormous and more than a little daunting." She watches as Malon lies down and gets comfortable, rolling up in the quilt and falling asleep.

"To think I nearly thought you didn't exist." Impa says looking at the massive maiden. "How wrong I was." She creeps from the shadows. "There's a bit too much of you to pretend that is true irregardless of how well Link played it off." She comes upon the message. "What have we here?" She reads it. "So he did know... I have underestimated him once again since I was confident he hadn't detected me at the time he had to have left this message." She thinks a moment.

"But if this hasn't been one big exercise in underestimating him I don't know what is." She looks at Malon again. "Amazing, simply amazing…" She departs.

X

At home Link and Saria are talking seriously. She's been questioning him for the last half hour.

"So that's why she's bigger? Magic beans?" Saria asks.

"Yeah, we think one took root and waited all this time to grow." Link replies.

"What's her name again?"

"Malon."

"So Malon is twenty-five feet tall?"

"Twenty-seven feet." Link corrects. "I measured."

"She's twenty-seven feet tall. Does anyone else know?"

"Good question." Link says. "That depends on whether Impa has seen her or not."

"Impa? How does she fit in all this?"

"She's been following me the last few hours. If Impa knows, Zelda knows."

Saria nods. "They are close."

"Now you understand what I meant by 'things' to take care of."

"There is one thing I don't understand." Saria says at length. "Why exactly were you with her in the first place?"

Link sighs. "You won't like this."

"Please tell me."

"Alright. Sometimes you and the other sages can be trying at times you understand."

"Trying?" Saria says innocently. "What do you mean?"

Link chuckles. Though Saria is a sage she is still a child. "Nerve wracking. Irritating." He replies as kindly as he can.

"Oh…sorry."

"It's not all your fault. I understand why you do it I just can't take it sometimes. I'm a little old to play tag and you always ask me to."

"You don't like it?" Saria looks depressed.

"No, it's not some much that as I'm too big for it. I've grown up and it's a kid's game."

Saria nods. "I understand."

"The other sages push things on me too. Zelda treats me like a hero all the time. Nabooru sees me as her personal rival. As for Ruto, she thinks I'm her future husband. It can be frustrating at times."

"Why don't you tell them?"

"The same reason I didn't tell you. I'm afraid of hurting their feelings. Besides they don't listen anyway."

"Oh."

"If only there was some way I could get them to listen…"

"…" Saria looks troubled.

"What's wrong?"

"Sorry about when you got hit with a Deku Nut. I know you were only playing because I asked you to. It's my fault."

"No, I enjoyed it and should've expected a trick like that out of Mido anyway. He never played fair when I was younger."

"You enjoyed it?"

"Up until I blacked out." Link smiles.

Saria appears happy. "You still are the best shot in the forest."

Link nods. "Some things you always remember."

"I feel better." Saria gets ready to leave. "See you later."

"One more thing." Link says. "Could you…"

"You've got it. Under my little green hat." Saria leaves. With that Link decides to turn in.

X

At Hyrule Castle Impa has reported back to Zelda.

"I have found Link, princess."

"You have? Thank you."

"I will send for him tomorrow as you requested."

"How did you find him?"

"Sheikah secret I cannot say."

"You always say that."

"It is part of being a Sheikah."

"Did you find where he's been?"

"Very likely."

"Did you see the red haired girl?"

Impa pauses. "…No."

"Well, she isn't important anyway. Thank you again."

"You are welcome." Zelda takes her leave and Impa looks after her guiltily. "Some things it is better that she doesn't know." Impa decides going to bed.

X

Malon is up having a midnight snack. She's having a bit of trouble sleeping having taken a nap a little earlier after crying herself to sleep.

"I miss Fairy Boy. He was nice to have round." Malon thinks to herself. "But I guess he had to deal with something else. His life cain't revolve round me." She pops a loaf of bread in her mouth.

"I should be grateful for what he's done already. He's been pullin' for me from start. He's there when I need to talk and willin' to do farm work. He's been buyin' me all the food I need out his own pocket. Altogether he's done a lot for me." She pushes the food cart away.

"He even was thoughtful enough to get me this blanket. I would like to repay him but what can I do? Talon and I cain't even afford to pay him for the work he's done much less reward him. I feel like such a leech." She lies down.

"On top of all that he's bein' real nice about it! He don' even seem to remember what I did to him. He jus' wants to help, that's it. He hasn't asked for anything and I'm not even sure he'd accept a gift. He's not lookin' for a reward and I don' even have one to give, which bothers me a bit. I have no way to pay back what I owe him." She wraps the tarp-sized cover around herself.

"I'll think of somethin'. It's the right thing to do."


	5. A Minor Disagreement

Link wakes up in his treetop loft, late as usual. Some things never change.

"What time is it?" Link wonders, getting up. "Looks like around nine o'clock." He looks around and sees his cow. "I could use some fresh milk." He opens the jar and begins to fill it. "Malon!" He remembers. "I've got to check up on her!" He leaves his house.

Now on the field Link is walking as fast as he can limp.

"Epona can't come; she's still stabled for the night." Link thinks. "Talon must've put the horses in and isn't up yet so he hasn't let them out. Malon can't operate that door so I'm going to have to walk." A shadow crosses his path. He draws his sword. "Who's there?" He demands.

"As though you don't know." A voice says from behind him. "You've known I was behind you for some time now."

"Your point, Impa?" Link asks sheathing his custom sword.

"You are wanted at the castle. Zelda wishes to see you."

"Do you know why?"

"No, but it shouldn't matter. The princess has requested your presence."

"What if I have more pressing matters?"

"I assure you that you do not. There is nothing more urgent than the summons of the princess."

"I think I may have more urgent business elsewhere."

"She will be fine a few moments without your supervision. She can fend for herself I'm sure."

"Then you know about Malon?"

"Indeed I do. Fine job on hiding it from everyone."

"Does Zelda know?"

"I haven't told her as of yet. I did not deem it relevant."

"I would like to accomplish whatever this is and be done with it as soon as possible."

"I understand but I make no promises."

They hike the rest of the way to the castle in silence.

X

On Death Mountain Darunia is pondering something. It's been on his mind since three days ago. With no word from Link he's got nothing to go on and the curiosity is eating him alive.

"I told brother to come back and tell me how this thing turned out." Darunia muses to himself. "Those ladies blew through here looking fit to skin him. I hope he's alright because if they caught him who knows? They can be downright mean if you push them…" He pauses.

"But he is the Hero of Time. His skills as a warrior are only rivaled by his resourcefulness. Brother may yet be slippery enough to avoid catastrophe." He laughs heartily. "I hope so for his sake!"

X

At the ranch Malon is waiting for Talon to come back with her lunch.

"Malon!" Talon calls. "I'm back, come and get it!"

"Thanks pa." Malon walks over to the carriage. "It's bout time you got back."

"So I was a little late, quiet down! The important thing is I'm here now."

"After you dozed on the way to and from the market I'll bet!" She says accusingly towering over Talon.

"Don't you give me no lip! You may be tall but you still my daughter and she ain't no smart mouth!"

Malon has to laugh at what he just said. He's telling her off while standing in her shadow. A funnier sight she's never seen. "Sorry pa." She replies with a straight face. "I didn't mean to mouth off."

"I don't see why that Link feller didn't do this if I'm gonna get all these complaints. I really don't feel like doin' all this…"

The enlarged young lady rolls her eyes and sighs. "Because he isn't here. Nobody did the mornin' chores either in case you haven't noticed."

"I don't see why he ain't come round yet. He's right in the middle of the market posin' for some kinda statue or somethin'. He could stop by and do the chores right quick."

"He's in the market doin' what now?" Malon asks.

"Posin' for a sculpture or somethin', I seen him just now when I went to get your lunch."

"I know he cain't hardly stand stuff like that." She makes a decision. "I'm marchin' over there an givin' that Zelda a piece of my mind!"

"Huh?"

"I'm goin' out a while. I've got somethin' to say to the princess."

"Be home before dark and be careful."

"Okay." Malon walks off.

X

In the marketplace Link is in a lot of pain. Posing for a statue for the center of the market square is not what he planned on doing with his morning, especially given the condition he's in.

"OW!" Link yelps. "I told you I hurt this leg yesterday, I shouldn't be resting all my weight on it!"

"Ah, ah, ah!" Zelda admonishes. "Statues don't talk! Hold your position."

"I can't; it hurts too much!"

"We're almost done." The sculptor informs him.

"Wha-ow!" Link falls over.

"I said hold your position!" Zelda snaps.

"You can only expect so much from him in that state." Impa mentions. "Physical limitations prohibit him from following your command."

"Done!" The sculptor declares. "At least with you anyway. I don't need you here to finish."

"Now can I go?" Link asks.

"No, Nabooru wants to see you." Zelda replies. "We're going to pay her a visit."

"I think you should let Link go. He's done what you asked of him."

"No, he's been putting us on the back burner for this red haired girl too much lately. You and I both know it."

"With good reason though, I assure you."

"What could that be?"

"Princess you should really hear him out. I'm sure-"

"Sorry we have to go. We have quite a bit of catching up to do." Zelda and Link disappear in a green flash of teleportation magic.

"He has a good excuse…" Impa says to now empty air.

X

In Hyrule Field Malon is walking along. She's headed somewhere she's never had to walk to and it gives her more time to take in the scenery.

"Sure is hot today." She thinks plodding along. "Ain't hardly no shade neither." Hyrule Castle comes into view. "For a second I thought I was lost." She walks up to the drawbridge. "Here goes!" She walks into the market.

People are screaming and fleeing at her approach. They're running into each other and other things staring at her. It's generating it's own chaos. She's been there thirty seconds and a riot has already broken out.

"Monster!" Cries a citizen.

"Demon!" Yells another townsman.

"Evil!" A third person screams.

Malon stops and looks around. "I'm lookin' for Link, have any of you seen him?"

"She's come to get the Hero of Time!"

"Who will protect us then?"

"Evil!"

"I guess I'll have to find him myself." Malon begins to take measured steps forward so as not to injure people. "Please move out of my way."

As though bent on suicide a man runs right in front of her. Malon, not wanting to step on him, moves to step somewhere else. She finds traction in a market stand, which gives way and turns slippery with fruit juice. She loses her footing and falls forward driving her hands into a building to support herself and avoid crushing those under her. These people look up and are not consoled by the fact that the titanic teenager is suspended above their heads instead of on top of them.

Malon pushes herself out of the building with some effort and additional damage to the structure. "Where the heck is he?" She wonders knocking over an additional stand with a distracted step. "This is gettin' out of hand…" Suddenly she spots something.

"That's the statue of Link!" Malon thinks. "That guy messin' with it has to know where Link is!" She picks up the artist. "Where is Link?"

The artist is too scared to reply. He shudders uncontrollably. "…"

"Where is Link?" Malon repeats.

"…Please don't hurt me." The man begs.

"Then tell me where Link is!" Malon demands giving the man a squeeze.

"The princess said something about Nabooru, catching up, then vanished! I don't know! Please spare me!"

"Okay." Malon sets him down. "Sorry."

"Malon, is it?" Comes a voice from the ground. "Perhaps I can be of assistance?"

X

At the Desert Colossus Nabooru is explaining to Link and Zelda how she has renovated the Spirit Temple. Since it's been her pet project she's proud of herself.

"Since you've been through it I've been wondering how I could use it." The Sprit sage begins. "Was it meant only as a trial for the hero?"

"I thought so." Link replies.

"Me too." Nabooru agrees. "Especially since there is only one Mirror Shield. But I got around that pretty quick, take a look at these!" She gestures at a pile of shiny plates of metal.

"What are those?"

"Replicas of your shield. For the purposes here it is perfectly fine."

"Ingenious!" Zelda remarks. "I couldn't have thought of anything better!"

"There is one problem though." Nabooru says slightly less enthused. "Even with these shields nobody has completed the trial. I don't know if I made it too hard or what. That's why I need your help."

"You want me to go through there?" Link asks in disbelief. "Again?"

"Just to see if it's doable." The gerudo lady cajoles. "If anyone can do it, you can."

"No, the Spirit Temple gives me a headache. If it is anything like before floor tile and pottery will form a coalition against me and my skull."

"Come on, I need you to do this."

"No. I am not having my head ring for days on end again." The valiant one seems adamant. "It's not happening."

"I know you don't like fighting anymore. That's why I thought this would be the perfect exercise. Plus I _really_ need your help on this, you're the expert!"

"No, I-"

"Nonsense." Zelda butts in. "He'd love to help, isn't that right?"

Link is shaking his head. "No, I-" He repeats.

"You can do her this simple favor can't you? It should only take a minute."

"It should be a breeze for you, Hero of Time!" Nabooru agrees.

Link sighs and trudges toward the entrance. "No matter what, they never listen." He thinks to himself.

X

In Kokiri Forest Saria is just waking up.

"I wonder if Link is awake." Saria says leaving her house. She climbs the ladder and enters his dwelling. "Yeah, looks like he left early. Probably to check on Malon." She leaves his house.

"Or maybe not. He could be going to visit the sages and explain what's happened and how he feels like he did for me. He should, it would clear up a whole lot of confusion. But I guess it depends on whether they understand or not. He said they don't listen. I listened last night, why can't they?" She gives it some thought.

"It is different for them I suppose. I've known Link the longest, I understand him best. I suppose he's right, they probably don't listen. If you think about it though you can understand why. They hardly know the guy. From here all I can do is wish him luck."

X

In Hyrule Field Malon and Impa are moving pretty fast. They've got somewhere to be and somebody is serious about getting there on time.

"Where is he now?" Malon asks of the sheikah hanging from her hairpin.

"In Gerudo Valley somewhere." Impa replies. "I'm pretty sure of that, Malon."

"How do you know my name?"

"I read the note Link left you."

"So you're the one followin' him round." She doesn't even miss a step wondering or sound angry. "Why?"

"The princess asked me to. She wanted to see him."

"Don' she know he cain't stand the red carpet treatment?"

"No, though I have begun to notice."

"Why haven't you tol' her?"

"It is not my place."

"I'm givin' her a piece of my mind when we get there. Inconsiderate spoiled brat…"

"She is a princess." Impa says tiredly. "What could you expect?"

"For her to treat her subjects better!"

"How can you get any better than the way she treats Link? It is as though he is a prince!"

"But does she listen to him?"

"…no."

"He jus' wants to talk most of the time. Relax and jus'…well relax."

"You seem to know a lot about Link, are you two an item?" Impa sounds intrigued. "I've been wondering…"

"No, what made you think that?"

"Well I thought you and he maybe because of what he said." Impa relates what Link said.

"What did you think we were-oh." Malon gets Impa's drift. She laughs about it. "No, no, nothin' like that, dirty mind!"

"What exactly happened?"

"A massage. Nothing like what you're thinkin' either I know. I hurt his leg a bit that's all."

"Why are you going out on a limb like this for Link then? Risking detection and what that means? There's got to be more to it."

"He's been so kind to me and we've been friends a pretty long time. After all he's done for me lately if I can help him get across to you people I'll feel like I've paid him back. Why are you helpin' me?"

"I couldn't have you standing in the market place scaring everyone. I am doing it because is the right thing to do. I have another question."

"Go head."

"You don't want to hurt the princess do you? There isn't much I can do but…" The princess's bodyguard sounds resolute. "I'll do my duty."

"Goodness no! I plan on screamin' her stupid but that's about it. I don' want to harm anyone."

"What about the sculptor?"

"He was squirmin'; I didn't want him to fall!"

The explanation seems to meet with Impa's approval and she let's the subject drop. "There's Gerudo Valley, right across that bridge." She says suddenly.

"You think that'll hol' my weight?" Malon asks dubiously. "I'm heavier than I look."

"Only one way to find out."

Malon takes a tentative step onto the bridge. It creaks but holds strong. She walks two more steps to the center of the connection. That's when it starts to break up. Her feet go through the planks and she grabs the support ropes to avoid falling in the river. The anchor lines stretch and snap sending her and the majority of the suspension into the canyon wall.

"Ow! That hurt some." Malon pulls herself up hand over hand and grasping the edge. Upon clearing it she dusts herself off and looks around. "So this is the place where the bandits live? Never been here before."

"There should be a guard here. That is strange." Impa says. "Something isn't right…"

"This is where Link is?" Malon walks into the Gerudo Village. "Doesn't look like anybody's here." She says peering into the adobe buildings.

"The Spirit Temple is the only other place they could be."

"Which way is that?"

"Through the desert over there. I don't think we can get through though."

"Yes we are. Ain't no breeze an dust turnin' me round." Malon declares trekking through the sand.

X

In the new and improved Spirit Temple Link is having a very irritating experience. Having already been through it as a child and an adult he's tired of it.

"She didn't change the puzzles at all." Link thinks sourly. "She just made it so that every piece of floor and debris would eventually attack you. That hurts." He takes a swig of milk.

"To top it off because of all that I've fallen down to the other floor a half dozen times. I can add sprained ankles to my contusions this place was kind enough to replace. If I could just make it clear that I don't want to do this stupid crap, I didn't like it then and I don't like it now." Link gripes as he solves the last puzzle. He walks into the last room.

"She made some kind of boss?" Link says exasperated. "Will this ever end?" He looks around. "Aw crap."

Four Iron Knuckles are advancing on him. They are black, gray, silver, and gold. They have hammers instead of the normal axes.

"She went and found all the armor she could reanimate and did." Link says. "I guess they have hammers so they don't cut your limbs off. She wouldn't want to seriously maim her own people I suppose. Pounded to powder beats removed I guess…" He draws Biggoron's Nail. "Great."

X

A good while later a very bruised Link is teleported outside the Spirit Temple. He arrives on the platform facedown glowing a dim blue color. He doesn't look so hot.

"You did it!" Nabooru rejoices. "I knew somebody could! I guess these slackers will just have to raise up their skills if they want to compete with the male bandit, huh?"

"Good job." Zelda states. "You are still worthy of your title."

"How did you survive?" Nabooru asks. "I thought four Iron Knuckles would surely slay anyone?"

"Nayru's Love is a powerful spell." Zelda explains. "Its magic surrounds him even now. It would not let his bones break."

"I bet it still hurt a lot, he looks pretty rough. I think he's been through enough for one day, that temple can really take it out of you. Let him go."

The ruler of the kingdom shakes her head. "We've still got one more stop to make. Ruto asked us all to come by if you remember. She has something special planned but didn't say what."

"Oh yeah, that. I guess he can sit through that and go home. He looks really exhausted."

"Come on, let's go." Link stumbles to his feet wobbly and they all disappear in Farore's Wind.

X

Malon and Impa are plowing through the desert. Despite the warning of the shadow sage and the legend that only the ghost of the sands can lead you to the Spirit Temple she's stubbornly pushing forward.

"How much further?" Malon asks.

"Not like I can tell you. I can't see." Impa replies.

"There!" The redhead says. "I see it through the storm!"

They emerge into the area of the Desert Colossus. Many worn out Gerudo women are lying on the ground. They are too tired to make any kind of fuss over the huge Hylian. They are too busy moaning and writhing about. They've been through the Spirit Temple and found their skills lacking so they have all seen better days.

"Ask them if they've seen Link." Malon requests of her passenger. "I don' want to bother em."

Impa leaps down with ninja agility and questions a fallen thief. In practically no time she is back with an answer. "They have been here and gone." Impa states. "I know where they are now as well."

"Where?"

"Lake Hylia."

"That's a heck of a ways from here! Runnin' everywhere in the world ain't no easy thang!"

"Can you swim?" Impa asks, seemingly out of the blue.

"What?"

"Can you swim? You're going to have to take the river to the lake because the bridge is out. It will take you right to where you want to be though."

"Where in Lake Hylia? Which shore? Don't get me swimming laps around the pond!"

"I have a hunch you'll know." Impa whistles the Serenade of Water and disappears in a crackle of blue energy.

X

At Lake Hylia on the island of the Water Temple many people are gathered. It's a special occasion and has an amazing turnout. It's no wonder; this isn't the type of thing that happens every day or ever as a matter of fact. This would be the first time in the country of Hyrule that something like this has ever happened and history is in the making.

"I can't believe she's actually going through with this." Darunia whispers to Saria while keeping one eye on the water.

"Me neither, the whole thing is really weird." Saria replies.

"I never thought it would get this far." Impa agrees.

"Or that she would have the nerve to do it." Nabooru says disbelievingly.

"Is it me or does this not seem correct?" Zelda says unsteadily. "I always thought she was kidding so I never really gave it any thought."

"Me either." Saria says.

"I feel the same." Impa vocalizes.

"Same here." Darunia affirms.

"Ditto, but here we are…" Nabooru concludes.

"You'd think brother would have something to say about this." Darunia says.

"He can't be too crazy about the idea." Nabooru agrees. "Seriously."

"Have you seen him?" Impa asks. "Look at him, he's dead on his feet!" She gestures at Link tottering drunkenly.

"I don't think he's going to be saying anything…" Saria says quietly.

"Thusly we shall witness this event for the travesty that it is powerless to do anything." Zelda declares hopelessly.

"Shh!" A Zora commands. "The ceremony is about to start!"

"Dearly beloved we are gathered here today to join this pair in holy matrimony." The Zora priest begins. "The hero Link and Princess Ruto are here to make the bond that lasts forever. As this is a particularly auspicious occasion many may have misgivings. I ask that you speak now or forever hold your peace."

"We've let this nonsense to go on for seven years." Darunia realizes. "Now brother will pay the price."

"We've had so long to set her straight." Impa contemplates. "To inform her of the right path that it is our fault."

"It is as though we encouraged it by allowing this day to come." Nabooru ponders. "Though we were just pretending that it wouldn't."

"I always thought he and I would be together someday." Zelda reflects. "Eventually but now…"

"Am I the only one who thinks this is wrong?" Saria wonders.

"Then you all consent to this union?" The priest continues. "Do you Ruto take this man to be-?"

"I do." Ruto kisses Link who tilts askew.

"And do you Link take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife?"

"Uh, da…" Link mumbles shell-shocked.

"Then I pronounce you both man and-"

"Ya'll stop all this foolishness this minute!" Malon roars emerging from the water to stand on the crowded isle. "What do you think you're doin'?" She spots Link who has decided to take a tumble off the altar. She steps into the middle of the ritual and catches him before he cracks his head on the ground. "What have they done to you?" She whispers enveloping him in her arms.

"What is that?" Darunia asks, looking like . "I missed something."

"Red haired girl." Saria and Impa say together.

"Wouldn't want to mess with her…" Nabooru comments.

"Why wasn't I informed?" Zelda demands of her guardian.

"I did not deem it worthy of your attention." Impa says guiltily. "I am sorry."

"I'm trying to get married!" Ruto yells, addressing the enormous wedding crasher. "And you have no part in it!"

"You're right." Malon acknowledges. "But then again neither do you!" Everyone gasps.

"I'm not letting you stop me from marrying my beloved!" Ruto declares.

"For cryin' out loud honey, he's a hylian! You're a fish!" This gets some snickers from the other sages.

"You dare insult me on my wedding day?" Ruto glows and a pillar of water strikes Malon. She doesn't flinch under the stream.

"Sweetie I'm already soaking wet. I don' care." The rancher informs her.

"Let him go!"

"So he can fall on the floor? He cain't even say his own name much less stand up straight! If you got to rope em in half dead you're pretty pathetic anyway if you ask me. You might as well marry a statue, least it won' leave you as soon as it wakes up. They've got a new one in the market that'd suit you darn well!"

"No, We're supposed to-" But one glance at the scornful look on Malon's face pushes her to the breaking point. Ruto bursts into tears and dives into the water. The Zoras look at Malon angrily.

"Go on before I eat the lot of you!" The gargantuan girl threatens. "Get out!" The rest of the aquatic people exit, not willing to see if she's going to back up her ultimatum. "Dang on high-falutin fish fillets…"

"She was pretty hard on Ruto." Saria says to her sage companions. "I feel sorry for her."

"Those words had to be said." Impa begins. "She needed to hear them."

"She had to get set right one way or another." Darunia agrees.

"The whole idea was pretty crazy." Nabooru affirms. "Someone had to say something."

"Sometimes people's feelings have to be hurt to get a point across." Zelda concludes. "There was no other way."

"Hey you down there!" Malon calls. "Don' think I'm lettin' you off easy!" The sages look uncomfortable. "Yeah I'm talkin' to you! It's your fault Link got into this mess in the first place! What kind of friends are you that ya'll didn't say nothin' when his life nearly got ruined?" She stares at the elemental avatars that look even more ill at ease with a hard gaze.

"You wouldn't catch me anywhere near you if you would let somethin' like that happen to me after we supposed to be friends." Malon continues. "But you're lucky Link isn't like that. He's a great person; he'll even forgive Ruto in time so he'll forgive you too I guess."

"What right do you have to judge us?" Saria asks. "I've been there for Link longer than anyone and we're good friends!"

"Then you know he go into this because of you." Malon says.

"What?"

"Because of you. Link hops out of bed an plans on doin' nothin'. You come along an suggest you play a game. He tells you he's visitin' Zelda then he does. All because he didn't want to hurt your feelings. He didn't feel like playin' a game and didn't think you would understand."

"…I do now." Saria says quietly. "He explained it to me. I know."

"He cain't be your childhood friend anymore. He's grown up." Saria nods and disappears in a green burst of energy.

"Well I guess I'll be going. I haven't done any wrong by my brother yet so-"

"You're full of it! You gave him the stupidest advice you could. Because of you he jus' bout got killed in a sword fight!" Malon snorts derisively.

"I meant well…"

"That means a lot when you're damn near dead." Darunia disappears in a flash of red.

"I'm next…" Nabooru says uneasily. "I know it…"

"You've pushed Link to his limits again and again! First you run my horse half to death then you put him through the mangle. If that ain't enough the next day you cut him to ribbons!"

"He could've done better!" Nabooru says. "It's not my fault he was holding back!"

"Yeah it was! You are his friend and friends don' hurt friends. Not to mention you're a woman and Link wouldn't hit a woman."

"I wanted to test his skills…"

"Because he's the male bandit, I get it. That's gonna be the death of him one of these days and you're gonna end up dealin' with me then." Nabooru nods nervously and exits via orange light. Malon glares at Impa next.

"What could I have possibly done to Link?" Impa asks. "We've had no contact."

"All the things you didn't say. You knew what was happenin' an kept your mouth closed."

"It is the sheikah way."

"How many of you are there left? Maybe there's somethin' wrong with thinkin' that way!" Impa dissipates to shadow.

"What do you have to say to me?" Zelda inquires. "I'm ready."

Malon looks at Zelda then shakes her head. "You are the most immature and selfish person I have ever seen in my natural born life, you should be ashamed."

"What? How dare you say that to me!"

"Is that all you think about? Me?" Malon asks. "I shouldn't be surprised, you castle-born, spoiled brat…"

"Well I never…" Zelda seethes. "Who do you think you are?"

"I'm his friend." She replies, looking down at the person in her arms. "How about you?"

"We are more than that! You couldn't understand _our_ relationship. We have an understanding of each other so deep-" Malon shakes her head at this statement. "You cannot tell me what Link and I have!"

"Okay. Since you all are such good friends…tell me something about him."

"What?"

"You heard me. Tell me something you know about him."

"I don't have to put up with this! It isn't a pop-quiz!"

"I'm beginning to wonder if you even know Link at all…"

"Certainly!" Zelda says hastily. "We talk all the time!"

"Okay, then tell me his favorite color. That's an easy one." The princess looks unsure and on the spot. "I'm sure you know that much, right? You are _real_ close aren't you?" The lass with the fiery mane teases.

"We are, make no mistake there!" Zelda snaps back. "And his favorite color is…yellow!" She says triumphantly.

Malon doesn't say anything. The moment is pregnant with tension. The lake is nearly still since there are no other people around and there's the tiniest bit of an echo of the princess's declaration drifting across the water. The hush is broken by laughing, seemingly out of nowhere and soon the entire pond is alive with the noise

"No, it's red." Malon says, pulling herself back together. "I bet yellow is your favorite color." She giggles again. "You've never met this man have you? You've been so busy with festivities and parades in his honor that you've never exchanged words once? Link said as much but I didn't believe him." The country bumpkin shakes her head.

"Amazin', you have never spoken to him and would've let him marry a fish yet you are good friends." The pale hylian sovereign is speechless after hearing all of this and looks positively mortified. "It was an honor meetin' you, Princess Zelda." Malon says wryly, accenting the statement with a curtsy. A yellow gleam of light denotes the princess's exit.

Malon looks down at the person she has wrapped in her arms. "Sorry I was late, it took a while catchin' up to you."

Link's eyes open and meet hers. "…Just glad you came…" He falls back asleep.

X

Link is resting held tightly against Malon in the center of the horse enclosure. The sun is setting and they are sitting together bathed in its light. It's a picturesque moment that would be captured in the minds of any who witnessed it.

"Sure is nice." Link says absently.

"Mm hm." Malon agrees. "You said it, Fairy Boy."

"You got all of them to calm down?" He asks to be sure. "The last thing I remember was something at Lake Hylia…"

"Don't worry about it. I took care of it."

"I can just kick back and rest?"

"Yep. I got somebody else doin' the chores today so take it easy."

"I could do this forever."

"It doesn't have to end." Malon squeezes him a bit more and he smiles with her arms all about him. That's when he realizes it isn't a dream.

Fin


End file.
